


The Dating Game

by TribalVipe



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Awkwardness, Dating, F/M, Love, Sexy Times
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-04
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-09-14 17:13:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 30,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9195626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TribalVipe/pseuds/TribalVipe
Summary: One drunken night leads to a love confession. Thus begins the dating game.





	1. Drunken Mistake?

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Yeah, I don't know. The inspiration struck and I wrote it in an hour. So, here it is. Enjoy!

Waking up to an incredibly loud alarm clock wasn't what something she normally did.

She woke up naturally; her body was adjusted to Noah's sleep schedule which correlated nicely with her own work schedule. The only downside was her night shifts she found herself pulling from time to time. Unfortunately, sleeping in wasn't part of her routine at all.

Liv grit her teeth and shoved her hand out from underneath the soft down comforter she was buried under, reaching for the alarm clock that was blaring somewhere to her left. It was a little dumb that she was blindly searching for whatever was blasting music, but there was no way she was ruining the warm little cocoon she woke up to.

It was too cold outside and Tucker's apartment (and they were in his bed because she didn't own an alarm clock) was most likely freezing. Plus, she was naked and just _no_.

She finally slapped a few buttons and the music cut off, leaving her to slip her arm back into the blankets and cuddle down against the pillow underneath her head. Even though she had kind of a dull ache in her head and her breath still smelled like alcohol from the New Year's Eve party the night before, all she wanted to do was catch a few more hours of sleep before she had to leave.

Noah had spent the night with Lucy, who was too busy studying early for her next semester courses to go out and party with her friends, and she would need to go relieve the babysitter in a bit. Preferably after she had some breakfast and a nice hot shower.

Luckily, she didn't have to work that day and planned it so her and her little man could spend some quality time together on the first day of the new year. It was always extremely hectic the last couple weeks of the year and she hadn't been able to tuck him in or wake him up half the time. So she was definitely looking forward to the day ahead.

Liv was just about to fall asleep again when a strong arm wrapped around her waist, followed by a warm and equally naked body snuggling up behind her. She smiled and sighed at the feeling of warm breath hitting the skin of her neck, lulling her back into a peaceful slumber.

Except.

Liv's eyes sprung open as a stray thought entered her mind.

_Tucker wasn't at the party last night…_

The smile fell from her face and her eyes widened in some semblance of horror. She was fully awake now and the dull ache in her head increased at an alarming rate.

_They had ended it a week ago after Tucker transferred to Brooklyn…_

The body behind her moved a little and a small mumble made her tense. She knew that voice. She could recognize that voice anywhere, even if it was only an unintelligible mumble. Liv opened her mouth like she was going to say something but did, only a small squeak when she felt something poking her thigh.

_OH. MY-_

"God."

Liv turned her head and looked straight into Barba's eyes. They stared at each other for a total of 2 seconds before they scrambled away from each other and pulled back the covers. Liv jumped out of the bed and stood up, but dove for the floor when she realized she wasn't wearing any clothing.

"What the hell happened last night?"

Liv peeked over the bed to see Barba, holding his head and looking around for his t-shirt like a wild man. She did the same, searching for the dress she wore last night and found it next to what looked like an undershirt.

Grabbing for it, she tossed his shirt at him and quickly maneuvered her dress over her head the best she could in the position she was in.

_Shit. Shit, you have to be kidding me. Where the FUCK ARE MY SHOES._

"Oh my God," Barba said again and she looked up, dress successfully on, to see him holding an empty bottle of Cuervo and a can of whip cream. Her eyes widened and she shot up, a blush creeping along her face and chest. Barba gulped and dropped the items back on his bed, refusing to look at the woman standing there.

He quickly slipped on his undershirt and reached for his boxers that, thankfully, hadn't made it off the bed.

"I-I don't know what to say," she blurted out, spotting her lacy underwear and bra sticking out between the mattress and the bed frame. She calmly reached for them and crumpled them up into a ball, nervously looking at her colleagues face.

"Liv…I don't even remember what happened last night. Maybe we didn't do anything," Barba suggested as he stood up. Liv's gaze unintentionally dragged down to his crotch before she could stop herself.

And he noticed.

"We were both naked Rafael. I'm pretty sure after an empty bottle of tequila and all of the shots we had at the bar, it lead to something."

Barba just nodded, unsure of what to say himself. He bent over and picked up her heels, which had landed over on his side. She took them gratefully and slipped them on, feeling the overwhelming urge just to run away, leave the city and never look back. Say goodbye to their professional relationship.

"Well, we can be adult about this."

Liv took a deep breath, trying to calm her racing mind, "I agree. This doesn't have to change anything at all."

"Exactly," he agreed.

Except, it kind of already had. She was finding it extremely hard to look at him now and that wasn't good. That wasn't good at all. All she could look at was the rumpled sheets and down comforter she'd been cuddled under just moments before.

_I'm far too old to be acting like this. Shape up, Liv! Be an adult!_

"Let's just agree to never bring this up. It's water under the bridge," she said calmly. Barba readily agreed with a small smile that somehow made her feel just a tad bit better about the whole situation.

"Definitely."

They stood looking at each other awkwardly for another few seconds before Liv decided to make her exit. Barba walked her out to the front door, handing her the pea coat and scarf she wore last night as well as her purse. She shoved her undergarments into the bag discreetly when the ADA turned the other way to unlock his front door.

"Alright…uh…call me…maybe we can get some coffee later and talk things through a little bit more…make sure we're on the same page and all."

"Yeah, of course."

They said nothing more, just nodded at each other and Liv held her head high as she walked down the hall to the elevator, buttoning up her coat and wrapping the scarf around her neck before she straightened her hair out. She didn't want to make it obvious she had spent the night somewhere. Except, it was going to be hard when it was 7:23 a.m. on January 1st, and she was still wearing high heels and a dress and a pounding headache.

Yeah, she was way too old for this.

\+ 

After a nice hot shower, a mini mental breakdown and a nice cuddle session with her little boy, she finally took the plunge and told Barba to meet her and Noah at a nearby park so they could talk and Noah could play in the snow.

Really, she didn't want to meet up with him, but knew she had to. A simple agreement wasn't going to cut it. Because what she had done with Barba, even if she can't remember it, was reopening all sorts of feelings she thought she buried when she started dating Tucker.

Feelings that were really troublesome to have when they worked in such close quarters. But it was inevitable when she really thought about it. They had such a good working relationship and it had transferred well into a personal one.

Barba wasn't afraid to call her on her shit, even if it did annoy her to no end when he did it. That was one of the many things that attracted her to him to begin with. He was also a hard worker and wanted justice for the victims they helped serve, sometimes going above and beyond what any normal lawyer would do. He was smart and talented and funny and good looking-

"Liv," Barba called from behind her. She turned to see him carrying two cups of coffee towards the clean park bench where she sat staring at her son play with a couple of other kids. He sat next to her, keeping a reasonable distance as he passed her a steaming cup which she took gratefully.

They were silent for a good long while, just watching Noah run around and giggle in the snow, having a ball throwing poorly formed snowballs and making snow angels. It was a good break for her to collect her thoughts, wanting to word things correctly so she didn't say something wrong about this whole situation.

"I'm still a little hungover," he spoke, squinting his eyes a bit in pain. She bit her lip, not knowing what to say. Usually, she would come up with some sarcastic retort and joke around a bit with him, but now she wasn't sure it was the time do that. What they had done was serious and joking probably wasn't the best way to handle things.

So she just told him she was too, letting the silence hang in the air between the two of them again. It lasted for another two minutes before she decided to just jump in and begin the conversation.

"So about what happened," she began, but he cut her off suddenly.

"I'm not sorry."

Liv blinked, wide eyed and cocked her head to the side. Well, she certainly wasn't expecting him to say something like that. And she had to admit her heart soared a little bit when he looked at her with a determined smile. It made the corner of her mouth raise.

"Why?"

Barba sighed and looked down at the coffee cup cradled in his hands, thumb playing with tab keeping his liquid cool. Liv waited patiently, occasionally glancing between her happy son and her incredibly nervous…whatever he was.

"I have…feelings for you. God, that makes me sound like a teenager," he groaned, shifting his cup to one hand so he could rub at his eyes with the other. Liv held back a chuckle and instead scooted just a fraction closer.

"What I want to say is that I like you…that doesn't sound any better."

Barba looked over at her and sighed, "you get what I'm trying to say?"

"Yeah…," she trailed and reached over to touch his arm, "I get it."

"And I totally understand that you don't feel the same way. I mean, I wasn't ever expecting to tell you about my feelings for you, but I felt like I should let you know. It's time I acknowledge them anyway."

Liv was a bit shocked and just a tad bit upset that he automatically assumed she didn't reciprocate his feelings, but then thought better of it. He couldn't know she had repressed those same emotions for him. She was exceptionally good at hiding what she was truly thinking about, even with Barba who could read her like a book most of the time.

"You know what they say about people who assume," she joked, giving his jacketed forearm a squeeze so he would look at her. His face was confused for a split second before he completely understood what she was saying. He hadn't been prepared for that response.

"Really?"

Liv just nodded, smiling sweetly at him. After a moment, he smiled back and suddenly, everything seemed so clear and honest. Their little spat over the whole Tucker debacle had derailed their relationship and the rebuilding process had been slow to the point she wasn't sure they would ever be the same again.

Funny how one night of drunk sex they couldn't even remember (if you don't include the flashbacks she had in the shower that morning) fixed it within a matter of seconds.

"Mama! Look!"

Her attention briefly drifted over a Noah, who was helping to make a rather sad looking snowman with the new friends he made, effectively breaking the moment her and Barba were sharing.

"Good job, baby!"

The little boy turned back and ran to the group of children, tripping once adorably over the snow boots she forced him to wear. The two adults shared a laugh as they watched him before their attention drifted back to one another.

"So, what does this mean?"

Liv thought for a second, because what did this really mean? They had already crossed a line they really couldn't (and didn't want to) come back from. However, they moved way too quickly for her liking and she didn't just want this to become all about sex.

She cared too deeply for him for it to ever evolve into that. Plus, she wanted to have the full experience with him. First date, second date, third and beyond.

"It means, if you want to do this, you need to take me out on a date."

Barba chuckled and reached for her hand, closing it in his bigger one, "I can definitely do that."


	2. Caught in the Act

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I think I have an idea on where I want to take this story line and I'm excited to begin writing the next chapter. Enjoy!

Liv breezed through the precinct with a dumb smile on her face instead of her usual sleepy Monday morning scowl.

It probably looked out of place, judging by the unsure waves and smiles the officers milling around the lobby were giving her. They weren't used to seeing her so cheery, but she had a skip in her step thanks to a certain lawyer.

And she didn't ever think he would be the reason for that.

Yesterday, despite the awkward morning, had been a great way to kick off the year in her opinion. She walked around the rest of the day with an uncharacteristically stupid smile on her face that even Noah was accustomed to seeing. The best part was her waking up feeling refreshed and fulfilled this morning and she could definitely get used to that feeling.

It also probably had something do with the fact that the majority of that night's memories had come back to her in pieces. She wasn't going to be able to look at whip cream the same way.

As soon as she stepped off the elevator and walked through the squad room, she heard her name and a low wolf whistle coming from her longtime friend, making her stop a foot from her office door.

"Heard someone got a little crazy the other night," Fin drawled, feet propped up on his desk and smiling at his old friend. Liv tensed visibly when she heard Carisi stifle a laugh, followed by an audible punch to his arm by Amanda.

"W-what are you talking about?"

_Good job playing it cool._

"Too bad I wasn't there to witness it. Almost didn't believe it when I heard about it."

"Heard about what?"

Liv turned, schooling her features into a casual but 'answer-me-or-else' look that was usually only used for suspects who were trying to lie to her face. Except Fin wasn't a suspect and he knew her interrogation tactics like the back of his hand. He knew exactly what she was doing.

"Nothing, Liv," Amanda cut in, tossing a mean glare at the older detective while Carisi looked anywhere but at the Lieutenant.

Liv sighed, tipping her head back, "Whatever happened, because I seriously can't remember half of it, let's just forget about it and move on. All of you saw nothing."

She turned on her heel then, wanting to close herself up in her office and get started on the mountain of paperwork on her desk before Carisi piped up again.

"Hate to break it to you, Lieu…but half the department saw _nothing_ and no one's forgetting about it," he said, trying not to smile when the color drained from her face. Even though his boss was extremely uncomfortable and entirely unaware of her behavior the other night, he was just so happy that something finally happened.

"Please tell me there isn't a video," was the first thing out of Liv's mouth. God, she felt like she was suffocating. The silence and sideways glances answered her question and she groaned when Amanda pulled out her phone.

"If it makes you feel any better, we personally went around to everyone who was recording and made them delete it," Amanda said, being sympathetic to the situation. Honestly, she found it amusing but unsurprising and a little bit disturbing. She hadn't thought Liv could hold that much liquor but looks could be deceiving.

The blonde quickly brought up the video and handed her phone to Liv, the woman looking on nervously at what was playing on the screen. The quality was shaky and the sound, although turned down, was nothing but loud, vibrating music from the bar. If she looked around, she could spot a few of her fellow detectives and officers, laughing and drinking and having a good time ringing in the New Year, but her mortified expression watched the middle of the screen.

" _One more and I'm done!"_

" _That's what you said three shots ago," Barba nearly yelled in her ear, his body pressing against hers in a way she didn't mind whatsoever. The music was so loud she could barely hear herself think and she had to practically scream at the bartender for him to hear what she wanted._

_She wasn't used to parties like this, but she had to admit, she was having the time of her life. A night away from cartoons and police work were what she needed, even if she was going to feel it in the morning. None of that mattered though because she was surrounded by friends and her NYPD family._

" _Here," Barba said, handing her a shot glass full of whatever liquid they were consuming and they tipped their heads back at the same time. Liv, in her alcohol driven state, tipped back a little too far and Barba wrapped an arm around her waist to keep her from sliding off the barstool and onto the wooden floor._

_She laughed uncontrollably, leaning into him and wrapping her arms around his neck as he joined her, the two practically clinging to each other for support. She pulled back slightly and planted a wet, sloppy kiss on the counselor's cheek before she could stop herself._

" _Glad you came out tonight?"_

_Barba just nodded after returning a half-assed eye roll and she suddenly become extremely aware of the fact that he hadn't bothered to move his arm away from her waist. In fact, he pulled her just a tad bit closer, his hand gripping her waist like it was the only thing anchoring himself to the floor._

_Liv felt a flash of heat go down her spine and bit her lip, really liking the way he was staring at her and standing so close, she could smell the alcohol on his breath mixed with the cigarette he was puffing on earlier outside of the pub. It was a very intoxicating smell._

" _Well it was either this or sit at home alone in my apartment and watch the ball drop with my briefcase," he said softly, lips inching closer to hers and there was absolutely no way she was going to pull back. She'd thought about this moment happening far too often over the past few years, wondering what it would be like. It made her feel like a silly little teenager with a high school crush, but it was exhilarating at the same time._

_She tightened her arms around his neck, one brushing at the hair on the nape of his neck while the other played with the collar of his shirt, "I don't think I've ever seen your apartment."_

_Barba hmm'd and leaned in further, his nose bumping against hers. Their breath mingled in the space between them, hot and heavy with the scent of whiskey, "I wouldn't mind showing it to you."_

_And like that, the offer was on the table. In the midst of her arousal and the man shamelessly pressed against her body, she wondered if this was going to be a terrible idea. They were best friends, colleagues. They worked in close quarters and on more than one occasion, their tempers got the best of them, but they always seemed to get right back on track despite all of that. What if they did this and suddenly they couldn't work together anymore?_

_Would their dynamic be thrown off? What if they couldn't truly handle a situation like this? Dating Tucker had really thrown their relationship in the gutter and it was just getting good again. Whether or not it was because she was no longer seeing Ed, she wasn't sure, but what if this completely destroyed whatever rebuilt foundation they were standing on again?_

_Liv's mind raced for all of three seconds before she leaned forward and kissed him softly, letting their tongues touch briefly before she pulled away and whispered, "Let's go."_

Liv licked her lips and looked away as her and a drunk Barba stumbled out of the screen and out of the bar. She found it odd that she had no recollection of anything that happened in the bar, but she definitely had an idea of what happened after they left…

"Delete it," she said her serious voice, watching the blonde haired detective make quick work of the video. Behind her Fin winked at Carisi with his desk phone to his ear, the two obviously having seen the video before she had. Liv didn't know whether to be mortified that her entire squad witnessed her and Barba kiss and leave the bar together drunk or grateful for the missing piece of this weird puzzle from the other night.

Either way, all she wanted to do was lock herself in her office and drown in paperwork. Eight hours wasn't going to go by fast enough, especially since Barba had invited her and Noah out to dinner tonight as a sort of first date.

She couldn't lie, she was nervous. They had confirmed the fact that they both had feelings for each other and decided on taking it slow, one date at a time. His insistence that Noah take part in this particular endeavor made her heart soar, though. Barba was incredibly uncomfortable around kids and the fact that he was wanting to make an effort to get know her son better made her realize she was making a good decision.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Fin announcing they'd caught a victim who had just woken up from a coma down at Bellevue. Liv immediately slipped back into Lieutenant mode and readily took the lead with Amanda as her second, leaving Fin to hold down the fort while she was gone.

As the two made their way down to the hospital, they passed by the court house and Liv couldn't help but wonder how Barba's day was going and if he was thinking of her, too.


	3. First Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter seems a bit rushed, so sorry about that! But I'm enjoying the way this story is playing out and I hope you guys are too! Thank you for reading and R&R!

Barba fiddled nervously with his phone as he stepped off the elevator and onto Liv's floor. He'd been here before on strict work duty. They'd camped out on her couch more than once, drinks and take-out among all the usual paperwork their hefty caseloads came with.

This was the first time he would be knocking on the door to her apartment with no intention of working all night. No, this time they were going out on a date and he was nervous beyond all belief.

He psyched himself up so hard before he left his apartment, feeling odd in a pair of jeans, a leather jacket and a shirt. His normal three-piece suit had become so common place he actually felt more comfortable in suspenders than he did in casual attire, as weird as that sounded.

Furthermore, the fact that Liv had only seen him in casual clothes once or twice the entire time they worked together was really throwing him for a loop. The insecurities he long since buried were being dredged up at the most inopportune time. Had she grown feelings for 'Work Barba' only? What if she didn't like what she was about to see?

True, he let his guard down with her more than anyone else in his entire life, save his mother and abuelita, so she knew what he was like when he wasn't facing down hardened criminals or emotionally broken victims. But the most contact they'd had outside of work was…

_DON'T think about the other night._

Barba adjusted the collar of his shirt, feeling a flash of heat at the reminder of what they'd done and why they were currently doing what they were doing. Taking things slow meant not being constantly reminded of _that_.

He came to a stop in front of her apartment door and hesitated before he knocked a few times. What was even more nerve wracking was the fact that Noah was going to tag-a-long with them at his insistence. It was important to him that the little boy be part of the evening, because if this was going to evolve into anything, the two came packaged together.

Not that he and little boy hadn't made contact before. In fact, Noah quite liked him if the toothy smile and warm hugs every time he left from their work get-togethers meant anything. Barba would be lying to himself if he said it didn't make him feel wanted and like he actually had a shot.

The door swung open to reveal a casually dressed, barefoot Liv, a big smile on her face as she greeted him and waved him in. Noah smiled at him from his position on the couch but didn't get up, too engrossed in the show on the television to pay much attention to anything else.

"I'm just finishing up a phone call with Fin and then we can head out. Noah's all ready to go," she said, giving his arm a squeeze before running back down the hall to her bedroom, leaving him alone with the toddler. Barba nodded, watching her disappear before he moved to sit next to the child.

"What are you watching?"

"Guppies," he responded, shifting so he was sitting on his knees. He shared another smile with him, "We go eat?"

Barba nodded, chuckling at the childish voice that had already worked its way into his heart. He could feel the unbearable nervousness he felt all the way over here dissipate a little with just that little interaction. None of the tiny pep talks he whispered to himself on his walk over were able to do that.

Liv walked back into the living room a few moments later, typing away on her phone as she came to a stop next to where they sat.

"Everything ok?"

"Yeah," she said, "Fin and Rollins are just following up with a vic. Needed my input."

Barba just nodded, knowing the case file was probably going to be landing on his desk first thing in the morning with Liv badgering him about a warrant. Although, at least he had some warning this time around.

"So, should I be expecting you in my office in the morning or afternoon?"

Liv rolled her eyes but gave him a warm smile before grabbing at the jacket that was laying over the back of the couch. She quickly ushered Noah into his winter gear and shoes, reassuring him that they were going to eat, knowing he was probably starving just as much as she was.

"Where are we headed, anyway? Somewhere with a play place I hope," Liv joked, not expecting Barba to nod enthusiastically.

"Really?"

"Yeah," he said, realizing she was a bit shocked about that little fact. He had to admit, the family friendly restaurant he chose for them to go to wasn't exactly what he imagined a first date would be like, but it would give Noah a chance to play with other kids his age while giving them time to themselves which he was hoping for.

* * *

The restaurant was definitely family friendly, but with the open play place with a multitude of games and activities going on, left parents able to chat and hang out in the dining area while still keeping a close eye on their little ones.

And the food was to die for. She was amazed Barba had even found this place and the fact that he was enjoying it was another surprise. She admitted that she was shocked he was even remotely comfortable in this type of environment but he merely shrugged when she mentioned it and moved on to other unrelated topics.

"So there was a video…of the other night that Rollins took on her phone," Liv mentioned casually, biting back a laugh when he choked on his beer. His eyes grew wide and he leaned forward.

"Please don't tell me there's a sex tape of us floating around," he asked nervously.

"Of course not," she reassured him, laying her hand on his forearm while she sipped on her own drink, finding the position more natural than she thought it would be. Barba glanced down and smiled back until she said, "But we were definitely close to it."

He chuckled, adjusting the neck of his shirt which set off a plethora of dirty thoughts in her mind for some odd reason. She did her best not to think about it though, being in a family restaurant with her son playing only a few feet away from their table.

Speaking of, her boy came bounding over to the table, little feet zig zagging a path through the tables where families sat and she reminded him to slow down, expecting him to come straight to her. Except, he bee lined it for Barba, happily climbing onto the man's lap.

"Wanna pway wif me?"

Barba was sunk, he just knew it. Liv couldn't keep the stupid grin off her face and looked at the man expectantly, waiting to see how he put the little boy down. She could tell he was warring with how to deal with the excited toddler currently seated in his lap.

To her utter shock and awe, the words that came flying out of his mouth weren't a let-down. She watched as Barba hesitantly followed the little boy into the play area, kicking off his shoes and shoving them into a colorful cubby hole so he could walk along the padded play mats like some of the other parents had.

He looked almost like he belonged there, along with all of the other dads who were playing with their children or simply standing there and chatting with each other. Sure, he was awkward and looked so out of his depth it was hilarious, but he was trying and it was making her feelings for him grow deeper than she ever expected it could have.

She watched for close to twenty minutes, flipping between answering texts from her detectives and smiling dreamily at the sight in front of her. They hadn't been able to talk much, but this was probably the best first date she'd ever been on.

The two reappeared at the table close to thirty minutes later, Noah seemingly having grown fond enough of the man to want to be carried by him. He shrieked when Barba plucked him up off the ground as they left the restaurant and made the short walk back to her apartment.

When they made it to her floor, she unlocked the door and swung it open, watching her son tiredly shuffle in and sit on the floor to remove his boots and jacket with some help from Liv. She immediately sent him on his way, knowing he was tired and would be cranky in the morning if he wasn't asleep within the hour.

"Go put your jammies on, honey," she set him down and smiled while he ran to his bedroom, trying to take his shirt off in the process. Liv turned back to Barba, who had shoved his hands in his pockets and was rocking on his feet, looking nervous.

"I had a great time, don't worry," she comforted, knowing what he was thinking without him even having to say anything.

"Good…that's good. I'm glad. I had a great time, too."

"You were very good with him, you know."

She could see some of the invisible tension leaving his body at her words. He'd been terrified of making the smallest mistake when it came to Noah and hearing the admiration in her voice and the words themselves, it was reassuring.

They stood staring at each other awkwardly for a second before Liv decided to move in and give him a quick kiss, not wanting it to turn into anything more. She was going to uphold her end of their agreement to take things slow, even if she didn't completely want to.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she said softly and gave him a hug. She watched him walk down the hall and turn the corner for the elevator before she turned back into her apartment to get her son ready for bed.

Just around the corner, Barba couldn't keep the stupid smile off his face as he waited for the elevator, feeling like he was floating on cloud 9 with no chance of ever hitting the ground again.

And he wasn't terrified of that thought at all.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm on a roll, ya'll.

"Someone's got a spring in their step," Fin commented dryly as Liv walked through the squad room the next morning, feeling refreshed and ready to start the day.

Last night had been successful and Noah had taken a big interest in his new friend, asking a good ten questions about Barba before falling asleep to the sound of the white noise monitor in his room. It made her feel ten times better about their situation, knowing her little guy approved even if he was too young to understand how much that meant to her.

It made her feel like she could truly progress in this dating thing with the ADA, which is what she was hoping to feel. So she couldn't argue with Fin's words and she merely shrugged and smiled at him, checking her phone for a text back from the man on her thoughts.

"Carisi and Rollins are already interviewing our suspect in room one. Asshole, as usual."

"Why am I not surprised," Liv replied, already having gone over the report before finally going to bed last night. Her phone dinged and momentarily distracted her as she shot a text back to Barba.

"Where are we with DNA? And did we find the video?"

"DNA should be ready by this afternoon and the video was taken on a burner."

"Ok, so we're dealing with someone who was careful to cover their tracks. Pre-meditated, possibly," Liv stood up and moved over to the two-way window, hitting the speaker to listen in.

It was five minutes later when their suspect stepped out to call his lawyer and Carisi and Rollins followed him, directing him to an area with better service. Liv and Fin met up with them by their desks and Liv could see the visible tension in her two colleague's shoulders

"He's good. Deflects at the right moments, dodges questions and he's the calmest suspect I've ever interviewed with that much evidence stacked against him. He's calling Buchanan, now."

"Good, I'll call Barba," she turned on her heel and exited back into her office, shutting the door to give herself some privacy. Carisi sent Amanda a knowing smile to which the blonde just rolled her eyes.

"We knew this was going to happen. I don't know why you're being all smug."

Fin looked up from his computer to glance at the younger detectives, "Knew what was going to happen?"

"You know, the video I showed you? Where they're practically banging each other in the bar?"

"Don't remind me," he winced in disgust, "Liv's like my sister. I don't care who she's involved with but I don't want to see it."

Rollins chuckled and leaned against the side of Carisi's desk while the two watched the Lieutenant pace a path across the small space of her office, a big smile plastered on her face while she played with a strand of hair, phone pressed to her ear.

She looked genuinely happy and that was rare in their kind of work. With the things they've witnessed, shit that can't be unseen, and people they've encountered, it was hard to ever feel truly calm and at ease. Liv deserved to feel, just like they all deserved to feel it, and she was glad her boss was finding it with someone they could all approve of.

"Let's just agree to not bring it up. They'll want to keep things professional and we should too," Amanda sent a look to Carisi, knowing he had a habit of bringing up topics that weren't meant to be brought up, not because they were in inappropriate but because they usually weren't supposed to know about them.

Sonny looked genuinely confused at the pointed look she sent him and after a second she rolled her eyes and walked back over to her own desk to wait for their ADA and Andrew's lawyer to arrive.

* * *

 "Buchanan, incoming," Finn nodded over his shoulder as the burly lawyer made his entrance, causing Liv and Amanda to suppress their massive eye roll. Carisi didn't spare him a glance, not wanting to make a snappy comment as the defense attorney began his accusations of harassment like he usually did.

"At it again, are we detectives? I trust you've already told Barba what charges he should file," the lawyer dropped by Liv as he walked towards the interrogation room door. This time, Liv did roll her eyes but didn't bother to spare the man a glance over her shoulder.

"He's an ass."

"I hope you're not talking about me," Barba whisked into the squad room, having followed a good distance behind Buchanan so he didn't have to be stuck in an elevator with him. It was amazing just how much the man could run his mouth, surpassing Barba sometimes and that was a miracle in and of itself.

"If we were talking about you, we'd do it to your face," Liv said quickly, not hiding the big smile that spread across her face and definitely not missing the uncharacteristic one on his. Amanda could see Carisi practically fangirling over the interaction and she sliced her finger over her throat as a threat while Fin rolled his eyes and looked back down at the phone in his hand.

"I'm sure you would," he winked, making sure no one but Liv was able to see it before he moved on, "What's the story?"

Liv blushed but quickly followed behind Barba into her office while Amanda and Carisi made their way back into the room to begin the interrogation again.

"Andrew claims it was consensual, the video of the attack was taken on a burner. We have it but it's been wiped clean. DNA isn't back yet but I can most certainly tell you what it's going to say when it does."

Barba just nodded, keeping his eyes on the interrogation room window and removed his winter coat and suit jacket to throw on the back of one of her office chairs. She watched, feeling no shame in finding it incredibly attractive.

Who knew she was into suits?

"Well, then, this should be fun. With Buchanan we'll definitely be taking this to trial. Make sure it's vetted properly. I don't want any surprises."

He flipped on the speaker and began to listen in, Liv doing the same while reminding herself to be as professional as possible, not knowing he was telling himself to do the same.

The next half hour went by like any other interrogation, ending with their suspect walking out of the room with the large lawyer following, still throwing accusations and a friendly, 'See you in court' to Barba before they left. Barba merely nodded, jotting down one last thing on his notebook before he slid it back into his briefcase.

"Have to love him," he drawled sarcastically, snorting at Liv's over-the-top eye-roll. Out of every defense attorney they've had to face down, that one was by far the worst.

"I prefer Rita. At least she has some class. Although, I don't think I like the fact that she checks you out from time to time."

"She does not," he laughed easily, sliding his jacket back on and buttoning up before throwing the heavy wool peacoat on, "and enough about defense lawyers. I have something else I want to ask you."

"Shoot," she said, leaning back against her desk with her hands resting on edges of the wood. She watched as he hesitated, playing with the buckle on his brief case. He was trying to act casual and Liv found it to be absolutely adorable. Something about seeing him so nervous when it came to anything romantic between them was her favorite.

"I was wondering if you'd like to go to dinner tonight? Just the two of us? Not that I don't want Noah to go with us," he said quickly, not wanting her to get the wrong impression. He enjoyed their first date and interacting with the little boy more than he could have imagined, but a little alone time before this case blew up couldn't hurt.

"Of course! Although, you'll have to answer the huge list of questions he has for you before we go anywhere. Congratulations, you've been selected as my toddler's latest obsession."

Barba felt a flutter in his stomach at her words and his heart warm at just the suggestion. He feared the little boy wouldn't take to him at all and after last night, he felt like he made some steps in the right direction. Hearing it went better than expected just filled him with more confidence than winning any case ever could.

"He's a great kid, Liv. You're doing an amazing job."

He glanced over his shoulder, noting that the privacy blinds in her office were closed before he leaned in and kissed her cheek, lingering for a second longer than was probably appropriate.

"I'll see you tonight at seven, deal?"

Liv grabbed his hand and squeezed it, feeling her face heat up. She nodded and let go as he turned to leave the office, shutting the door on his way out. She could hear the muffled voices of her detectives sending him off and she took a moment to herself before she exited the office, needing to focus on work instead of their impending, Noah-less date.

* * *

 Dinner and a few drinks were all they really had time for that night. Andrew had been picked up after DNA came back positive and Barba was due in arraignment court bright and early in the morning and Liv planned on being there.

They still made the most of their time, though. The laughed and swapped stories of their time before SVU came along. Liv recounted some of the crazier cases she's ever had to be a part of while Barba simply listened, content to know what life was like before he ever came into the picture. He even threw in some stories of law school, shocking Liv when he mentioned he was Beer Pong MVP for the month of November '82 in his dorm.

Eventually, they found themselves standing outside of Liv's partially opened apartment door, relieving Lucy for the night. Noah was already asleep for which his mother was grateful.

"I'm sorry for earlier. He's the most curious toddler I've ever seen," she laughed, deciding to throw her purse on the coat rack by the door before returning to the hallway. She thought about inviting him briefly, but knew they didn't have any time to spare. He had mountains of paperwork to finish before tomorrow and she had her own little stack by her bedside, too.

"Don't be. We both discovered a mutual love for dinosaurs and I call that a win."

They shared a quiet laugh before dissolving into a silence, finding themselves in the same situation as the night before, except Barba was finding himself as the one initiating anything. He moved closer, making sure Liv was ok with it before he pressed his lips against hers and lingered.

Liv placed her hands on both of his shoulders not letting him pull away just yet. She silently prayed nothing would intrude on this moment. Her neighbors were in and out at all hours of the night, some headed to work and some just getting home and the last thing she wanted was anyone to see a known detective making out with a known ADA.

She shivered and came back to herself when he felt both of his arms wrap around her, his hands pressed flat against her back, pulling her a little closer. Her fingers ventured through the hair on the back of his head, nails lightly drawing paths through the soft texture.

He tested the waters when he allowed his tongue to swipe around her lip entrance into her mouth, which she granted immediately. Their movements were slow, passionate but not raging although this was certainly stoking their fire. He was perfectly fine with that, though. Just as long as this didn't stop any time soon. Kissing her was just incredible.

He felt one of her hands travel from his shoulder half way down his chest and wrapping around the tie that hung loosely around his neck, tugging him closer to her body. She couldn't help the tiny, helpless moan when she felt one of his large hands travel down the side of her body and squeeze her hip while the other landed farther down on her thigh.

She felt a spark of arousal shoot through her body and she knew they had to stop before things got too far, as sad as it made her. God, why was he such a good kisser?

Liv pulled back, giving him one last kiss and chuckling at the dazed look on his face as he tried to straighten himself out. He removed his hands slowly and somewhat reluctantly but he understood why she was ending their little make out session so quickly.

"Thank you for dinner," she said softly, their noses bumping briefly before they stepped away from each other entirely. She needed to cool down before she went inside her apartment and he had an Uber still waiting on the street outside.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he sighed, shoving his hands in the pockets of his slacks. The urge to touch her again was far too great.

"Ok. Get some sleep," she reminded him, knowing he was probably going to be up half the night before he decided four hours was enough to recharge his battery. Then again, she would probably be doing the same thing.

"You, too. Night, Liv."

"Night," she watched him go for a few seconds before turning back into the apartment and slipping off her shoes, needed a cold shower and glass of wine.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Starting to get closer! A little action but not a lot. I hope you're enjoying this fic so far!

"Out on bail already?"

"Parents are rolling in dough."

"Why am I not surprised," Barba huffed, annoyed. He was leaned back in his office chair, papers spread out across his lap and his sleeves rolled up. He'd been hard at work reading and writing vigorous notes in his book when Liv and Rollins walked into announce the bad news.

"That's not the worst part."

"Do I even want to know?"

It wasn't a question because he knew he was going to find out either way. This little asshole was driving everyone insane with the amount of crap he was getting away with. He was violent, narcissistic and had too much ego for his own good.

"He's back on campus and back in his frat house."

That wasn't what he wanted to hear and it was threatening to ruin his entire day. He was already knee deep in other clients and paperwork and this was just the cherry on top of the shit sundae ending his week.

"I'll talk to the judge. See what I can do. Until then, visit the dean…she if she can effectively suspend any fraternity events where other women can be involved and see about getting Bella off the campus. If there's nothing I can do to remove him, we can at least accommodate her until this thing is over with."

Liv nodded and relayed some directions to Rollins, the detective nodding vigorously before leaving the two of them alone in his office. Liv felt bad that he looked so stressed, but she understood that it was part of the job. He certainly had been more stressed before, but that didn't make it any better.

"How many cups of coffee have you had," she asked conversationally. She leaned on the side of his desk with her arms crossed. He looked at her like he didn't want to answer but muttered '6' under his breath. Liv shook her head, honestly wondering how his heart wasn't beating out of his chest from that much espresso.

"Ok. When was the last time you ate?"

"Last night and no, I don't have time to grab a bite. I wish I could but I can't with all of this paperwork," he looked at her apologetically and she just nodded and pulled out her phone.

"How about I order some food and keep you company? I can visit the dean afterwards and that gives you time to call the judge later."

Barba looked grateful at her offer and thanked her, taking a break from his work to watch her order take-out like it was second nature. She was looking exceptional and couldn't help but wonder when the last time she wore such a bright color or smiled as much as she had been lately.

Maybe he was the cause? It certainly would make sense since he found himself walking a little taller and being nicer to everyone in general. This woman was certainly causing ruckus in his way of living and he was enjoying it.

"All right. I'm going to swing by the precinct really quick and go pick up our lunch," she shoved her phone back in her pocket and stood up straight. She looked to contemplate something really quick as she stared at him. He was about to ask her if she was alright when she leaned down and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

A blush appeared on both of their cheeks at the unexpected show of affection, but he instantly felt his spirits lifting from the simple action. Just feeling her soft lips on his skin set off fireworks in his brain. The feeling of dread and doom he felt all day was suddenly starting to clear.

What was she doing to him?

"Hurry back," he said, reaching out to squeeze her hand.

"I will," she smiled and turned towards the door, "By the way, are you doing anything tonight?"

"Did you have something in mind?"

"How about dinner and a movie?"

"I'll bring some wine."

"Good. My place, 7 p.m. And, uh, dress casual," Liv threw him a wink before she left, leaving his door cracked instead of closing it all the way.

"Whatever you want."

* * *

 

Barba was surprised when the door to Liv's apartment door swung open to reveal an excited toddler, jumping up and down and all but screaming his name in excitement with a toy dinosaur in one hand. He was already dressed in his pajamas and freshly showered with his hair still wet.

Liv rushed down the hallway, waving him in but giving the little boy a stern talking to about opening the door without her and sending him off to the living room to play.

"I told him you were coming over tonight," she explained, taking his jacket from him as he kicked off his shoes. Barba simply smiled and leaned in to kiss her cheek, repeating her bold move from that afternoon.

"I hope you don't mind chicken nuggets and mac 'n' cheese. I let Noah pick out dinner one night a week and that happens to be Wednesdays."

"After that shady take out earlier, anything sounds appetizing at this point," he winked and walked towards the kitchen with a bottle of wine in one hand while Noah slipped his smaller hand into his free one. Liv shook her head as the little boy began talking excitedly about his day, Barba making sure to exaggerate his responses to keep him talking.

After they both ended their workdays, he brought up the topic of Noah during their text conversation and expressed his concerns about not knowing how to speak with kids in general. His fears were unfounded with her enamored toddler, though. Barba was better with kids than he gave himself credit for.

"Mommy! We eat?"

"Yes," she answered somewhat exasperated, "I swear he's a bottomless pit."

"I know the feeling," he said and rubbed his stomach. Not many people knew it, but he had a huge appetite and could pack it away while still remaining slim and relatively in shape. The first time Liv noticed just how much he could eat, she was genuinely surprised he wasn't incredibly overweight.

They ate a quick dinner since it was already relatively late. Noah was allowed an extra 20 minutes of playtime and spent all of it showing Barba his awesome Hot Wheels collection. The two raced them across the floor, smashing into invisible obstacles and performing flips through the air.

Liv couldn't help but watch them while she did the dishes, snickering at the loud booming and exploding noises coming from the lawyer's mouth, followed by her son's high pitched giggles. Soon enough their car chases evolved into an all-out plastic army man battle, with little green and tan men set up along the coffee table and couch cushions.

This lead to Liv sitting at the kitchen table, checking e-mails and letting the two play. It wasn't until Liv check the clock again and noticed the original twenty-minute deadline turned into an hour and Noah was sleepily rubbing his eyes as Barba helped him clean up all his toys.

"Bedtime, sweetheart," she said and the little boy nodded, not uttering a word about staying up any later. She could tell from the big, sleepy smile plastered on his face that he had fun.

"Baba, you come too?"

Noah snuck his little hand into Barba's, looking up at the man with tired eyes. Barba could feel his heart melting at the sight and he simply nodded, picking up the little box of army men and Hot Wheels they were playing with before.

Liv lead them down the hall to his bedroom, her heart almost unable to take the sight of Barba tucking her little boy into his bed like he was a natural at it. She shoved the box next to his toy box, not wanting to miss a moment of the two talking in hushed tones.

How Barba ever doubted his abilities with kids, she wouldn't ever know.

"Night buddy," Barba said and moved so Liv could lean down and kiss her already half asleep son goodnight. They left the room and quietly made their way back into the kitchen.

"I'm sunk," he joked, grabbing the bottle of wine he brought. Liv pulled down to wine glasses from her cabinet and watched as he poured a generous helping into both.

"He has a way of doing that," she agreed, remembering back to the moment she first felt that way. It was one of the best feelings she could have ever experienced and it was one that would last a lifetime. She lead them to the couch and they sat close to each other, Barba with his arm slung over the back.

"I know I've said it before but…you're really doing a great job Liv. He's lucky to have a mom like you," Barba said in all seriousness. It brought tears to her eyes every time he said something like that because sometimes she felt like she wasn't doing anything right when it came to parenting. Having an outside perspective meant a lot to her and having him, of all people, say it meant something special.

But she couldn't put all of that into words. It would be too difficult and drawn out and a long speech wasn't what she wanted to give. Actions worked best with the both of them and so she decided that was the best course of action.

Liv leaned forward and pressed her lips against his, one of her hands cupping his cheek. He slung his free arm around her waist and deepened it, feeling comfortable enough now that he could take some control that she didn't mind giving him.

They sat there for what seemed like an eternity, too wrapped up in each other to notice anything else until her back began to ache from the odd angle she was sitting at. She could tell he was getting a little restless as well, so she pushed him away. He looked devastated at the loss of contact, but that quickly went away as she swung one of her legs over his and came to sit on his lap.

"Too much?"

She giggled at the way he vigorously shook his head and leaned down to continue their session, this time being a bit more aggressive and enjoying the hell out of the soft moan that produced. She could feel his hands, that had been resting on her thighs, travel up the sides of her body, one of them unintentionally dragging up her shirt.

The rough fingertips against her back sent a shock of arousal straight to her core and she briefly thought about ending this because this was moving far beyond what was considered 'slow' but damnit, she didn't want to. She'd been craving this contact since this whole thing started and he was acting as if he had, too.

Would it be so bad if they skipped ahead a few steps?

The hand moving up the back of her sweater and the other moving down lower on her ass didn't seem to think that was a bad idea.

Maybe she should test the waters?

With a sudden flair of confidence, she dragged her hips against his, feeling his growing bulge through his jeans. He nearly came apart and so did she as he bucked against her, breaking their kiss and forcing them to look into each other's eyes. He looked unsure and she knew she did too and that wasn't something she wanted present when they did take that step.

Plus, this was technically their third date. That would be jumping the gun too quickly, no matter how badly they wanted to.

"Sorry," he whispered, moving his hand down the skin of her back but he didn't remove it when it landed just above the line her jeans. Thankfully. She loved the contact far too much for it to be healthy.

"It's ok. I liked it," she said back, resting her forehead against his and closed her eyes, wanting to enjoy the intimacy of being like this, tangled on her couch. It made her feel so safe and comfortable, washing away any of the remaining stress she was feeling earlier in the evening.

Liv wished they could stay like that forever, but real life struck that thought quickly in the form of her son calling out for her from his closed bedroom door. They both chuckled and shared a few lazy kisses before she slid off his lap and went to check on Noah.

Barba watched her go until she disappeared into the darkened bedroom before he let his head fall back on the couch and deep breath escaped his body. He desperately tried to calm himself down for the next few minutes, urging his body and his mind to resist heading into those dangerous waters.

Their promise to take it slow was still holding strong and he was glad for it. He never really thought about it, but he was realizing that his past encounters never lasted more than a few nights and a lot of them were merely one night stands. He'd spend the night in someone's apartment and then never talk to them again. That's just the way things went. He was far too busy, work too demanding and no partner would ever understand that.

Except for Liv. She understood perfectly what he was going through because often times, she was in the same boat. He supposed this was the reason they were technically on their third date and he had no intentions of running.

Far from it. In fact, his feelings were only growing stronger and deeper than he could have anticipated and it was making him nervous but excited. Butterflies in his stomach wasn't a new sensation but it had never been this strong.

Liv popped out of the room a minute later and stopped by the kitchen to grab the bottle of wine on the counter.

"He ok?"

"Yeah, just had to check for monsters," she smiled and sat down next to him, closer as she refilled their glasses and handed him his. Grabbing the remote, she tucked her legs under her and leaned into his side, his arm circling her and resting on her waist as she found a movie they could both agree on.

"Hope you like chick flicks," she said excitedly, starting a movie that looked like it was either going to make him cry or fall asleep within the first twenty minutes.

"Love them," he sarcastically replied and she laughed, giving him a sweet little kiss. She reached for the blanket that hung over the back of the sofa and threw it across her body and his lap.

"Good. Because you'll be watching a lot of them."

He couldn't wait.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: It's starting to get spicy! Thanks to everyone who is enjoying this story. Midterms and all this homework and work is threatening to kill me, but I promise I'll finish my fics before it actually does :D

The case they’d been working was open and shut. An easy win for Barba and the squad and their victim was recovering with a smile, which was a victory for everyone all around. Not often did the outcome end in such a positive way, but they would take it.

Unfortunately, only a few hours after that win, they were meeting with another victim and catching another case, cutting her lunch date with Barba short. It also didn’t help that a migraine flared up right as their victim started naming a plethora of suspects but with no real idea of who it couldn’t have been.

It was going to be one of those cases and it had been one of those cases. After two weeks, three rescheduled trial dates and a messy incident involving a shoot-out, they had slowed down considerably. In fact, they slowed down so much, Liv invited Barba over to her apartment for a work get-together the night after the trial was finished.

She promised it was only a professional meeting to catch up on the heinous amounts of paperwork that had accumulated between the two of them. She found working on her stuff while he sat close by raised her productivity, although some of that had to do with the fact that she found him incredibly pleasing to look at.

However, since they started this thing, she was having a hell of a time trying to keep her hands off him. Those past two weeks were pure torture, their hectic schedules keeping them from seeing each other and limiting their communication to late night phone calls and a few flirty texts throughout the day.

The times they did get to see each other, the squad was present and it put a damper on both of their moods when they couldn’t touch or kiss at all in their presence. Pure torture that lead them to where they were now.

Liv exposed her neck, moaning softly as his tongue traced its way down past her clavicle and inching dangerously close to the edge of low cut blouse. They were laid up on her couch, Barba between her legs and looming over her as they made out like a couple of horny teenagers with no supervision.

Some late-night talk show host was talking in the background and the carton of ice cream they’d both been sharing was practically all the way melted through, but none of that mattered. What did matter was that man’s mouth, teeth nipping at her bra and causing her to lose her damn mind.

Their lips met again in soft, little kisses, her hands moving on their own and untucking his dress shirt from his slacks. He hadn’t bothered changing into casual clothes and decided to just head over to her place straight after work. He apologized for it but she didn’t mind at all. She always enjoyed watching him loosen his tie and roll up his sleeves. They were small, everyday things he did when he was trying to get more comfortable, but damn if it didn’t make her day.

“Should we stop,” he said, not bothering to phrase the statement as a question so their lips could meet faster, not being able to stray from each other for too long. Liv wanted to scream ‘HELL NO’ but settled for breathy ‘uh-uh’, not wanting to seem desperate. They were still taking things slow, but there was no denying the mounting sexual tension between the two.

It was every day and in everything they did. All those times they were in the same room over the past few weeks, but joined by the detectives? Nothing but eye sex, slowly undressing each other, doing things with their eyes and thoughts they couldn’t and wouldn’t (yet) do with their hands.

She had a hope that it would boil over tonight, even if the only thing planned was for a steady few hours of work and some dinner. Maybe, somewhere in the back of her mind, she had secretly planned this and it was terrifying if it wasn’t planned at all. The likelihood of her and Barba ever being able to be alone together without touching was growing smaller and smaller every moment they had with each other.

The closer and more comfortable they became, the more it was going to affect their work dynamic and that was a scary thought. They worked so well as a team already. What about disclosing? The sooner they told their higher ups, the better, but what would that lead to?

So many questions needing to be answered, but only one thought on her mind as her hands ran up under his shirt, feeling the hot, bare skin of his back. This time it was his turn to moan, leaving her mouth and going back over his trail down her neck and chest with hot, wet kisses.

“Raf,” she said quietly, trailing her fingernails back down the length of his back, causing him to buck his hips against her, his arousal becoming known and shocking her with pleasure. She arched her back into him as he hesitantly bucked against her again. She looked up into his eyes, clouded over with lust before she leaned up and bit at his lip, encouraging him without words to continue.

He slowly rolled his hips against hers, slower and gentler but no less pleasurable, “Should we stop?”

His voice was shaky, his movements never slowing as he uttered the same question again. She could understand his hesitance and questioning, not wanting to push too far without making sure she was fine with it first. That’s what working sex crimes did to you but she couldn’t help finding it sweet that he was double checking with her.

“And do what?”

He stopped his movements and laughed, resting his forehead against hers and enjoying the way she chuckled. Her hands stopped their continuous movements, palms resting flat on his back and feeling the muscles move as he readjusted himself on top of her.

“Get some work done,” he suggested, barely sparing a glance at his forgotten pile of papers and folders on the coffee table sitting next to hers. Liv gave him a skeptical look, knowing he was joking but unable to resist a jab at him.

“More attracted to your briefcase than me, Barba?”

The lawyer scoffed and gave her a quick peck on the lips, “Not even remotely, Benson.”

“Good,” she countered, bringing one of her hands from his back to land on his ass, squeezing it and making him jump just the tiniest bit to her amusement, “Now why don’t you show me.”

Barba smirked before he leaned back down again, beginning his slow movements and lasting for all of five seconds before they both heard a distant call for her coming from the back of the apartment. Barba stopped and pulled back, watching as she groaned, both listening to the door to the bedroom open and Noah’s tiny socked feet walking further down the hall.

“Mommy?”

“Yeah, baby,” she said, regret filling her as she pushed Barba up. He quickly got up and planted himself on the other end of the couch, pulling a pillow over his lap as the toddler quickly came into the living room with his stuffed bear and rubbing his tired eyes. Liv stayed in her prone position, smiling as his tiny face came into view.

 “What’s wrong, honey?”

“Scary dream,” he sniffled, burying his face into her chest. Liv cooed at him and ran her fingers through his hair while rubbing his back in a soothing motion.

“It’s ok baby, it wasn’t real,” she whispered in his ear. She sat up and pulled Noah onto her lap, wrapping her arms around him in a warm embrace. He sat there for only a few seconds before he shimmied out of her arms and threw himself at Barba.

It was comical how large the lawyer’s eyes got and he looked awkward as Noah threw his arms around his neck and rested his cheek against Barba’s chest. At the same time, she wanted to laugh at his unsure expression, her heart was melting into a puddle of goo. It was unfair how damn adorable both looked but it also filled her with something she couldn’t explain.

After a few seconds, Barba began to relax a little and wrapped his arm around the boy’s back, resting his cheek on top of his little head. A soft grin, one she never witnessed before, spread his lips and he glanced at her. She stared into his eyes, knowing he could read just about everything she wanted to say but wouldn’t…not yet.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, honey,” Liv broke their gaze and focused in on her toddler, cuddled down into Barba’s chest comfortably. He yawned before he mentioned something about a cartoon. Liv quickly switched back to the television and turned on some late-night kid’s cartoons show that immediately drew his attention. Liv moved over and cuddled in next to them, running a soothing hand over her son’s head until he fell asleep.

“Thank you.”

Liv looked up, stopping the soothing motion as Barba’s voice broke through the gentle lull in her living room. She sat up a little straighter as she saw the emotion in his eyes and heard it in the way he spoke. For a second, she was confused. The lawyer wasn’t one to thank anyone for anything. Some called it rude, others just assumed it was his personality. Liv had grown used to it, accepting it and moving on.

Hearing him say it now, it surprised her and confused her.

“What do you mean,” she whispered back, not wanting to wake the sleeping toddler but wanting an answer. Barba just continued to stare into her eyes but didn’t speak any further. Instead, he leaned over the best he could and kissed her gently.

Liv sighed into it, letting her eyes drift shut and a sudden wave of sleepiness sweep over her. She pulled away and gave him a simple peck a moment later before letting her head rest on his shoulder and throwing her arm around her sons back along with his.

She didn’t want to get her hopes up, but she was already starting to get used to this.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Just a little chapter to help move things along. I'm not sure where I want to take this story yet, but I'm enjoying the process of getting them together and evolving their relationship. Enjoy!

The smell of some delicious aroma of food roused her from her sleep.

Liv sniffed the air, her stomach rumbling as her mouth began to water. She stared at the ceiling for a second before she figured out she was on her couch, covered with the fleece throw blanket to ward off the cold in the apartment. She took in her surroundings and quickly realized Barba was still there; his shoes, briefcase and coat still hung out by the door and their work from last night was separated into neat piles, probably organized in alphabetical order knowing him.

She heard a childish giggle from the kitchen and she chuckled when she heard a familiar grown man chuckle following it. Liv moved to sit up, ignoring the back pain shooting down her back in favor of seeing what the two boys were up to.

From the couch, she could see Noah sitting on the kitchen counter in his pajamas, holding a salt and pepper shaker and hanging on to every word Barba was saying. The man had his back to her, but she could tell he was cooking and talking quietly, probably doing his best not to wake her up.

She was content to sit there and watch them for a while, enjoying watching the happy way her son helped around the kitchen until she saw Barba slide fresh bacon on to a plate. Liv got to her feet, rubbing her back before stretching and joining them in the small kitchen.

"Mommy! We make you food!"

"Thank you, sweetie," she said back with equal enthusiasm. She plucked him off the counter and gave him a big kiss before she sent him to the table.

"And what do we have here?"

Barba chuckled and leaned in for a kiss which she gladly returned. She squeezed his arm and went about fixing a hot cup of coffee, eyeing the plethora of mouthwatering food spread across the counter. She didn't even know she had that much food in her fridge to begin with.

"How come you didn't tell me you could cook?"

Barba scoffed, "You have my mother to thank and the fact she practically forced me to help her cook breakfast every Saturday morning."

Liv just nodded, now eyeing the man finishing up the sausage sizzling in the pan and finding him ten times more attractive than she thought possible. Where the hell had he been hiding? He could cook, he made her son laugh and he was a great kisser?

She hit the damn jackpot and was just now realizing it.

"Well thank you Lucia," she joked, picking up a slice of bacon before she grabbed the entire plate and moved it to the small dining room table. They went about eating a quick breakfast after realizing they only had about two hours before they were needed in their respective offices.

"Thank you for cooking us breakfast," she said, polishing off her plate and cup of coffee. He reached over and squeezed her hand, still shoveling seconds into his mouth. Noah had eaten half of his food before he gave up and begged to watch his cartoons in the living room.

"I enjoyed it," he said sarcastically, enjoying the eye roll as she got up to gather the dirty plates. He followed her into the kitchen, helping her carry the load to the sink and starting to wash. She simply waved him off, telling him she'd get it later and ended up with her arms wrapped around his neck, standing in between him the sink and enjoying the warm embrace with their foreheads pressed together.

It was a position that was quickly becoming common place between them and she couldn't deny it was addicting. Everything from the way he felt to the way he smelled seemed to calm her down. Even during those ridiculously long two weeks without being able to touch like this, just being near him relieved some of the stress she normally carried around in her shoulders.

"Well, you can stay over as much as you want if we get amazing breakfasts like that the morning after," she joked, enjoying the way he laughed and squeezed her tighter. She kissed him slowly and let one her hands drift into his unkempt hair. The product that had stayed in his hair overnight made it feel a little greasy, but she didn't mind it.

After a minute or two kissing they pulled back and just simply stared at one another in peace, not wanting to let go of each other and stay in the little bubble they created, but they had jobs to do and victims to help.

"You need to get going. We both need to get ready," she said, fixing one of the collars curled sides but still not stepping away from him. He was silent for a moment, something seemingly on his mind and he voiced it only a second later.

"Liv, what are we?"

She looked at him, confused at his question. He noticed and didn't let her confusions simmer without an explanation.

"I know we're dating right now, testing the waters…but I feel like we've tested them enough…," he trailed, biting his lip anxiously as he awaited her response. Liv, who was confused before, knew where he was going with it. Honestly, it was an internal struggle she'd been having for the past few weeks herself.

Was there a name to what they were? Maybe a label they could slap on it and get it over with? She never stopped to consider the fact that he was having the same questions as her. They both seemed eager to move forward with this and make it official.

"Are you asking me to be your girlfriend?"

Barba shook his head and gave her backside a swat as she laughed. She yelped and slapped his arm, chuckling at his fiend yell of pain.

"You make it sound like I'm some dorky teenager," he scoffed, enjoying the genuine happiness in her eyes. She leaned forward and kissed the tip of his nose, much to his annoyance.

"Well you're not a teenager but you are a dork," she whispered, bringing their lips together again in a more sensual manner that left them both wishing they weren't on a time limit and Noah wasn't a few feet away.

She sighed and disconnected from the kiss, but kept their face inches apart, "I would love to be your girlfriend."

Barba smiled despite his contradictive eye roll, "Don't make me regret asking you."

"Yeah right," she said louder and pulled out of his arms, checking the time and ushering him towards the door. Their two-hour time limit had dwindled to one and he needed at least thirty minutes to get ready and changed.

"Stop by for lunch?"

Liv nodded, helping him slide into his jacket and heavy coat after he slipped into his shoes. She quickly gathered his pile of work and helped him shove it into his briefcase. The movement dragged Noah from his trance and he hopped off the couch, slamming into Barba's legs at full force.

"Bye Baba!"

Barba laughed and leaned down to give the boy a few pats on the back, telling him he'd see him later. Liv smiled and watched him scamper off. She turned back to say something but her phone started ringing erratically, the ringtone synonymous with Fin. She instantly what the phone call was about. Fin, out of all the detectives, didn't bother her before or after work unless it was for good reason.

"I'll be in a meeting until ten so I'll bring the warrant with me," he joked, opening the apartment door and dodging another smack to his arm. Liv pushed him out instead, giving him a parting kiss and a promise to see him later before she hurried to answer her phone and get her day started.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I truly don't know where I'm going with this story anymore, but I want to continue to build on the tension between the two because it's just fun. The next part will feature Lucia who I've been throwing in all my fics as of late because I love writing her and she's just the BEST. Enjoy!  
> P.S. It gets a-spicy in this chapter, but nothing compared to the next one! BTW, Liv likes angry Barba. It's a fact.

Liv cursed under her breath and tapped her foot impatiently on the floor of the elevator.

Luckily, no one else was in the elevator to see her acting so childish as she sighed and flipped her hair behind her shoulder. It would be embarrassing, considering the fact that Noah was being more well behaved than her at the moment. Of course, the roles would be reversed while she was running late to a morning meeting at Rafael's office with her squad.

Lucy had called in sick, sounding like death and there was no way she was going to make the poor girl chase after her toddler all day while trying to get some work done of her own. Liv waved off the numerous apologies and quickly got off the phone with her, running around like a chicken with its head cut off to get them ready in time.

Having no other back up, Noah had to tag along. He wasn't excited at first, wanting to stay home and watch his morning cartoons but Liv might have dropped a name that had her little man practically dressing himself and packing his backpack with coloring books and plastic dinosaurs.

Rafael, unfortunately, hadn't been around in a week. Back-to-back work meetings, court dates and an influx in his already staggering work load left her boyfriend (that was still so weird and exciting to say) with barely any time to sleep, let alone spend some time at her apartment.

It was the way their jobs worked and personal time had to be sacrificed, unfortunately.

So, Liv herself was feeling as equally excited to see him, even if it meant in the presence of her detectives who still didn't have any clue what was going on between them. She was sure they didn't, anyway.

"Mommy, we go see Baba?"

"Yeah, honey," she said for what felt like the tenth time since they left the apartment. She could tell he was beyond excited, and she could admit it was rubbing off on her. The quick phone conversation the night before told her he was looking forward to it as well.

"Baba play wif me?"

"Maybe sweetie, but we have to talk about important stuff first, remember? You're going to color while the adults talk."

Noah didn't say anything, too busy singing a song from his favorite cartoon and forgetting completely what his mother was saying. Liv listened to him happily, loving the cute way he carried a tune, even though the words weren't totally right. He sang the rest of the way through the courthouse and to the office door.

He stopped when they walked through the threshold and all but screamed Rafael's name, scaring the living crap out of her detectives with the sudden intrusion. Liv winced, knowing this was a possibility, but she didn't have the heart to reprimand him or tell him not to be so excited.

Not that he would listen to her anyway.

Rafael looked nervous for a split second but welcomed the little boy with open arms, scooping him up and giving him a big kiss on the cheek. The two had become thick as thieves, that was for sure.

"Lucy wasn't feeling well so Noah gets to tag-a-long today," she explained to her confused squad. They took the excuse readily and looked on as the grumpy ADA showed a wider array of facial expressions on the child in his arms, some of them never having been seen before.

Liv felt a bit of a blush appear on her cheeks when Fin gave her a knowing smile and she figured if he knew what was going on, then everyone else did as well. Thankfully, they all avoided commenting on it.

She locked eyes with Rafael over Noah's head and he sent her a discreet wink before he continued talking casually to the crew seated around the round table in his office. He set Noah down, but the boy was still trying to gather his attention.

"Noah, baby, why don't you color a picture for Raf," Liv suggested quietly, drawing the little boy off to the couch while simultaneously trying to listen in. She helped him to unpack a blank pad of paper and a few crayons before she joined in, taking a position closer to Rafael than planned.

"He's smart…he's not just going to leave evidence laying around her apartment, especially if he figured she was going to call the cops immediately after," Carisi argued some point Fin had made, everyone feeling the frustration that was coming with this new case.

"Dig deeper," Rafael ground out, starting to get irritated with the constant back and forth, "There has to be something there. I don't care what it is. At this rate, I'll take a single fingerprint. The longer we wait the more damage he does."

Liv bit her lip, crossing her arms over her chest and unable to keep her mind completely on the conversation happening around her. She loved it when he got angry. When his mood turned sour, the more he wanted to nail whoever they were trying to catch that much harder. It was always good news for them when they were stuck trying to find evidence, as well.

But she also loved it because she was extremely attracted to it. Rafael being sweet and adorable and nervously stuttering was something she had grown fond of in the short time they'd been doing this. But seeing Rafael angry and scoffing at the mere suggestion they couldn't evidence lit a fire in her belly she couldn't extinguish.

Their eyes met again and something in his angry glare shifted to heated gaze. The smallest smirk appeared on his face before he dragged his eyes from her and stared down the detectives piled on his furniture.

"Find me something, and let's get this guy," he said, determined. Amanda, Fin and Carisi didn't say much but excused themselves, listening to Liv give them their orders and waited for them to leave down the hall.

As soon as they were out of sight, Liv turned back and sauntered over to him. Rafael was leaning against his desk, angry glare gone and replaced with roving eyes and a confident smirk.

"Hey," she barely had time to say before she was wrapped up in his arms and his tongue was thrust into her mouth.

She groaned and wrapped her arms around him, arching her body into his. She was keenly aware of her son sitting just a few feet away and the blinds still open to reveal an assistant-less desk, but Noah was far too engrossed in his drawing and Carmen was probably out, making copies or delivering some paperwork downstairs for her boss.

"Have I ever mentioned how hot it is when you get mad?"

Rafael's lips had traveled down her neck, giving her the chance to speak. She peeked over her shoulder, making sure her son was truly too busy to notice his mother's behavior. The last thing she wanted was for him to become curious and ask just what they were doing.

"No, but it makes me want to get angry all the time now," he spoke against her skin, hands traveling from her hips down to her ass very briefly. He was having a hard time trying to control himself. It had been and felt like so long since they'd seen each other and he was dying to kiss and touch her.

"Just as long as it's directed at my squad," she laughed, running a hand up the back of his head and through his hair. They shared a few more kisses and pulled away, both being reminded by the fact that were at work when Rafael's phone started to ring.

"Sorry," he apologized and untangled himself from her, sighing at the loss of contact. She trailed her hand down his back as he walked around his desk and quickly answered his cell. She went to check up on Noah, who moved from the couch to the floor.

"Let me see," she kneeled and fawned over his stick figures, listening to him point out who was who on the page. She tried not to let the picture, which was assembled a little much like a family drawing, get her hopes up in anyway. This relationship was still fresh and despite their obvious desire for each other, they still didn't want to rush anything.

Things were going too well for them to ruin anything.

Liv waited patiently for Rafael to finish his hushed and rushed conversation, listening to Noah singing his favorite song again as the grumpy lawyer joined them in the little section of his office. She smiled up at him when he leaned down and placed a kiss on her cheek.

"Sorry. My mother called, reminding me I made dinner plans with her for tonight. She probably figured I forgot."

Liv stood up and leaned into his side naturally as his arm circled her waist. They both watched Noah kicking his feet and happily drawing and humming away in his own little world.

"Did you?"

"…yeah…"

Liv chuckled and pressed her forehead into his. They stood in silence for a little bit, content to just be right next to each other. Rafael broke the silence by squeezing her hip.

"If you wanted…you could always join us."

Liv was a little surprised at the invitation, coming out of nowhere and blindsiding her a bit. Although, it wasn't like she hadn't met his mother before. There was that encounter in the hall of the court room and she vividly remembers the woman commenting on the fact that she drove him crazy. She also remembers feeling smug and shocked, hiding it behind an incoming text message.

"I don't want to intrude on mother-son time."

Except, she kind of wanted to. Guaranteed Rafael had spilled their newfound relationship to his mother even before they made it official and she wanted to know about it. Lucia seemed like the type that didn't mind embarrassing her son, anyhow.

"You wouldn't be intruding, trust me. Plus, it'll take some of the heat off me. Every time we have dinner, she does nothing but hound me about finding someone to settle down with. I know she's trying to help, but it's annoying."

"And does she know about us yet?"

He bit his lip, looking off to the side and that was the only answer she needed. She laughed and kissed his cheek just as _her_ phone began to ring. She pulled away from him and moved to a corner of his office, greeting Amanda who immediately started talking about the new developments that happened in the last ten minutes.

She eyed Rafael as he got down on his stomach next to Noah, smiling when the boy moved closer and handed the lawyer a coloring page and the specific color of crayons he never used. Rafael complained loudly about only getting brown, white and pink, causing Noah to giggle and share his coveted blue crayon happily.

Liv had to look away, forcing herself to focus in on the important details Amanda was trying to relay to her. It was really unfair that the two of them together was so incredibly cute and attention grabbing.

"Alright, I'll meet you guys at the precinct in an hour," she ended the phone call just as the door to the office swung open and Carmen appeared, purse over her shoulder as she scanned the room for Rafael.

"Mr. Bar-"

The young woman's eyes landed on Rafael lying on the floor, crayon in his hand and poised over the outline of a Mickey Mouse's classic outfit. Rafael looked at her like he got caught doing something he wasn't supposed to be doing, but played it off as smoothly as he could by greeting her in his usual tone of voice.

"Um…I'm going for my coffee break…"

Rafael nodded quickly, avoiding her questioning, confused look as she left the office. Carmen briefly locked eyes with her and the young woman looked ready to burst into laughter. She made the wise decision not to, but Liv was almost positive she could hear the distant sound of it traveling back into his office.

"Well…that was…not as embarrassing as I thought it would be."

"Aww, you're growing as a person," she teased. He mock glared at her as he stood up and checked to make sure his immaculate suit wasn't sporting any dirt or lint.

"Do you have to go back to the office?"

"I gave them an hour. Gives me enough time to stop down and get some coffee and a hot chocolate for this guy if you'd like to join us."

Noah raised his head at the mention of hot chocolate and started packing his things up. He looked up excitedly and abandoned his packing half way through to throw himself at Rafael, who scooped him up in his arms again.

"You come too, Raf?"

"I can't say no to that face," he playfully grabbed onto Noah's cheek, making the little boy swat at his hands and laugh. Liv quickly cleaned up the rest of his stuff while the two had a full-on conversation about the drink in question.

"Coffee gross!"

"Oh…my heart," Rafael playfully grabbed at his chest, throwing his head back dramatically. Liv shook her head, not sure if that reaction was genuine or just for show. The way the man talked about coffee made her think he loved it more than her-

That…was NOT something she should be thinking about. Liv bit her lip, mind racing and thoughts jumbling and crashing together in her mind as a slow, not so sudden gasp of realization escaped between her lips and caught the attention of the talking pair in the middle of the office.

"You ok over there, mom?"

"Mommy, you ok?"

Liv nodded, eyes wide and lips pursed as she whipped the backpack of her shoulder, desperate to get a move on. She waited patiently for Rafael to grab his coat and scarf from the back of his chair, folding up his open files and shoving them into his briefcase for safe keeping. As soon as they were out of the office, Noah ran in between them and grabbed onto each of their hands, talking about hot chocolate and how gross coffee was.

"Liv, I have so much to teach this kid. You've confused his taste buds."

"He's three. You want me to give a three-year-old coffee?"

"Just a little bit, here and there can't hurt," he joked, winking at her as they rounded the corner to the elevators. There were a few people milling about, but no one paid them any mind, thankfully.

"Then you're going to have to prevent him from bouncing off the walls of my apartment all day long if that happens."

"I could use a good work out," he laughed, swinging his and Noah's hands a little as they stepped onto the elevator. Noah looked up at him and smiled, excitedly announcing that he was getting hot chocolate, like Rafael didn't already know.

Liv gulped and watched them, the feeling of realization from earlier still lingering as she stared on, completely oblivious to the love struck look on her face.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Ok, so I'm not really thrilled with how this chapter came out and I'm almost positive it's because of my inability to write smut. So, forgive me for that. In any case, enjoy!

Liv smiled at the loud giggling drowning out the sound of the television playing in the living room.

It traveled all the way down the hall and into her open bedroom, where she stood applying light make-up and fixing her hair in the mirror over the dresser. She felt a little odd wearing a dress, knowing it was still winter despite there being barely any snow loitering the sidewalks. It at least had long sleeves to protect her arms and she would have to make due with her bare legs being exposed to the elements.

Rafael seemed to like her choice of clothing very much and she enjoyed seeing him wearing one of his suits, sans tie and vest. She could still see the suspenders peeking out through his jacket, though. Had to have those.

"You two sound like you're having way too much fun out there," she called to them, hearing their giggling intensify and a few weird, growling noises followed by a childish roar. Ah, the dinosaur game. Again.

She finished applying a light sheen of blush on her cheeks and decided to call that enough. She didn't want to seem like she was trying to hard when they met with his mother. Even though they'd already encountered each other once before, it was still nerve wracking meeting the woman as her son's partner. Especially since they'd only been dating for such a short amount of time.

It was a little odd that she didn't feel that nervous about the whole thing, though. She'd been expecting to feel anxious about the impending dinner after she headed back to the precinct that morning with Noah in tow. But surprisingly, she hadn't felt anything but excited, hoping work would rush along so she could get home, give Lucy (who was feeling way better than she did that morning) some pizza money and get ready for her date.

"Hey, Liv," Lucy appeared in her doorway with one of her textbooks open, but stopped and whistled despite her sore throat, "Are you trying to kill the man? For God's sake!"

Liv rolled her eyes but took the compliment, beaming as she grabbed her clutch off the dresser and slipped into a pair of heels she had stashed away for special occasions. She had to dig them out as soon as she got home, but they did wonders for her legs and they were comfortable as well.

"He can't die. I need him to win my cases. What's up?"

"I just wanted to remind you about that interview? For my criminology class?"

"Oh yeah. How about tomorrow after work?"

"Works for me," the young woman smiled and turned, prepared to turn back to the kitchen where she'd been studying previously before she poked her head in again, "Seriously, though, you look hot."

"Well I can see you're feeling better."

Liv chuckled and followed her down the hall, shutting off her bedroom and hall light on the way. She walked further into the living room and spotted Rafael on his knees, hands twisted like claws and making odd screeching noises as Noah dodged him, acting like he was running away for dear life, but moving from left to right and swatting at his hands. Rafael swooped his arms and yanked the boy into his grasp, tickling him and forcing the little boy to laugh maniacally while kicking his legs.

Liv cleared her throat, unable to keep the laughter in when Rafael noticed her and stopped mid screeching. Noah kicked out of his grasp and turned to face her, eyes lighting as he rushed around the couch and launched himself at her.

"Mommy you look pretty!"

"Thank you, baby," she kissed his forehead, lifting him off his feet in a big hug, "Your dinner is getting cold, go eat ok? Raf and I are going out to dinner."

"I go?"

Noah's little lip puffed out and he looked behind him, his little eyebrows knitting together as he used his best pouty face. Liv was able to dodge it by setting him down, knowing what he was trying to pull. Her son had the ability to manipulate even the strongest willed people, herself included.

"Raf?"

Rafael, who had stood and brushed off the knees of his pants, looked at Liv with wide eyes. She'd clued him in on Noah's abilities as well, warning him in advance for the moment her little boy would use it against him. Rafael had talked a big game, claiming a little three-year-old wasn't going to get him to do anything he didn't want to.

But as Noah threw his little arms around the lawyer's leg and asked in his little voice if he could with them, he fell apart like a wet tissue. Luckily, Lucy stepped in before Rafael could respond, tempting Noah with a bowl of ice cream and his latest Disney movie obsession.

Noah quickly abandoned his attempt at goading the two adults and cheered loudly, racing to the table where his lukewarm pizza sat. Liv thanked Lucy and wished her luck with her soon-to-be hyperactive three-year-old. Normally, she didn't like dumping a sugared-up Noah in the hands of her babysitter, but Lucy was ushering them out and she couldn't help but be grateful.

"Noah! Behave for Lucy. She's still not feeling well, ok?"

"Ok! Love you mommy! Love you Raf!"

The door shut behind them and Liv reached for Rafael's hand, noticing almost right away how he stood rooted to his spot, staring at the numbers on her front door.

"Rafael?"

"Did…did you hear what he said?"

"Um…," she trailed, not sure where he was going with this, "He said I love you mommy and I love you Raf."

Rafael looked her in the eye, eyebrows raised and looking like he was expecting her to say something or to understand the words that had just come out of her mouth.

"Liv…," he trailed, gesturing towards the closed door, "He said he loved me."

Liv nodded slowly, realizing he was shocked at the fact her little three-year-old just proclaimed his love for the man. Honestly, she wasn't shocked at all. Noah brought him up all the time in conversation and often begged to say hi to him when he knew they were speaking on the phone.

She found it endearing that he was so confused and baffled and the overwhelming feelings she had earlier (that she _buried_ as soon as she possibly could) came rushing back full force as she caught his eyes with a dreamy smile plastered on his face. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him as his arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her against him.

"I'm glad he loves you," she whispered as their noses bumped and she watched that slow, genuine smile spread across his face, making his already handsome face even more handsome in her eyes.

"I am too. Because I love him, too. I do, Liv."

"I know you do," she said back softly. There was the sound of a door closing the hall and Liv looked past him to see one of her neighbors walking their way, occupied on her phone and effectively ruining the moment between them.

"C'mon, we better get going. Your mom is probably almost there."

Liv grabbed his hand and dragged him along behind her, headed towards the elevator so they could finally get this night going.

* * *

 Rafael bit his lip as they moved in closer to the restaurant, nervously pulling Liv's body tight to his side, trying to ground himself as he spotted his mother through the window, sitting at a table in the center of the restaurant on her phone.

"You ok?"

The question threw him off a little bit and he loosened his grip on her waist, giving her some more room, immediately missing the contact of her body against his. Their moment in the hallway outside of her door had basically thrown him off for the entire evening, opening a can of feelings he hadn't had the chance to think about in the past couple of weeks.

Of course, those feelings being the fact that he was totally in love with the gorgeous woman on his arm and even more in love with her son, whom apparently loved him, too. Beyond that, they were about to sit down with his mother and other than that one meeting in the hall of the courthouse (where his mother revealed the fact he talked about her), Liv didn't truly know what the woman was like.

He loved his mamí with all his heart, he did. But she could be overbearing, nosey and embarrassing when she wanted to be and that was, usually, all the time. When he called her back earlier that afternoon and told her about Liv joining them for dinner, she merely accepted it and started talking about something involving his Tía Maria and her ten kids.

That response immediately set him on edge for the rest of day, because a nonchalant response from his mother almost guaranteed an interrogation. Now, he wasn't so naïve to think that Liv couldn't handle an interrogation. She was Lieutenant in an elite crime unit within the NYPD…she knew all about interrogative tactics. Except, this was his mother and everything his mom had gleaned off those shows on primetime television was somewhere between inaccurate and utterly ridiculous.

She'd done this with every partner he'd ever brought to meet her and after the last relationship she ran off…well, he vowed not to do it again for a while. However, with Liv, he didn't seem to want to follow that rule.

He didn't follow a lot of his own rules when it came to her.

"Just nervous," he finally answered and moved to open the door for her. He quickly moved in through the restaurant to the table his mother sat. She spotted them almost immediately and stood, smiling and waving him over into a hug. He obliged and stood back, gesturing to Liv. He could tell she didn't expect his mother to openly shove her in her arms and pat her back like she was an old friend, but that was Lucia for you.

"You look beautiful. Love those heels," she waved down at Liv's feet as they all took their seats. Rafael nervously ordered a scotch and Liv's favorite wine as the two women immediately descended into conversation, leaving him completely out and that's how it went the entire night.

The two women were so deep in conversation, he honestly felt like a third wheel, which he found both humorous and irritating. But his mother's interrogation tactics were met with honest and quick answers on Liv's end, and after that notorious list of questions, he zoned out and decided to mess around on his phone.

He was halfway through answering an E-Mail when he felt Liv's hand slid high up on his thigh and give it a squeeze. He looked at her, thinking she was just trying to get his attention, but she was laughing away at the story his mom was telling. He noticed that her glass had been refilled for the fourth time and he could tell she was a little tipsy. Good thing he wasn't alone, because he was on his sixth scotch and had to retype the same sentence at least three times.

Her hand stayed on his thigh as he kept surfing through his phone. He received a text message only a few minutes later and dropped his head foreward in frustration. Carisi's poorly timed text had him rolling his eyes and he typed a one word reply to punctuate his feelings.

Looks like his plan to sleep-in tomorrow morning were dashed in favor of an early morning arraignment meeting. Their unlucky suspect decided to try and make a run for it and ruined his plans in the process of being arrested. He was going to go for the throat tomorrow.

He could feel Liv's phone vibrate through her clutch that sat on the table but she ignored it, too busy chatting to care.

"Well, I better get going. I have work in the morning and I suspect you two do as well?"

Lucia looked at him and he nodded, quickly telling Liv the story Carisi sent him and she barely concealed an eye roll. Normally, she wouldn't give off such an annoyed response, but he would blame it on the alcohol.

He would also blame the fact that she almost fell out of her chair when she went to stand up on the alcohol, too. She laughed and let him help her up from her chair, taking advantage of him being so close to give him a kiss out of gratitude.

He pointedly avoided looking at his beaming mother, who was shrugging her coat back on. After proper goodbyes and promises to do it again soon, Rafael and Liv walked hand in hand back to her apartment, taking their time.

"Your mother is amazing," Liv swung their laced hands as they stood in the elevator, standing close to his side. Rafael chuckled. He knew. They spent the entire time getting along better than he'd ever seen his mother get along with someone else in his lifetime.

"I felt like a third wheel," he sighed dramatically and lead her out of the elevator as soon as the doors opened on her floor. Liv rolled her eyes, swaying a little as she lost her balance in the high heels on her feet. Honestly, he was still feeling very tipsy, but it was a warm feeling that settled in his stomach. He would sleep good tonight, which was going to be needed to get through the early morning tomorrow.

"I am very intrigued to see these baby pictures she promised. Did you really get your head stuck in a fence?"

"You two are never going meeting again," he grumbled. He hadn't caught that particular story and he was kicking himself now for not paying attention.

"We'll see about that."

He smirked but leaned in for a kiss, arriving outside her front door. She hummed and licked her lips when they disconnected, her hands opening her clutch and reaching for her door keys as she looked at him.

"Want to come in for a little bit?"

"I have to be at the court house at 7 and I'm assuming you'll want to be there, too."

"Yeah, I probably should," she pouted a little, jangling the keys a little bit. Rafael was torn.

If he went in there for 'a little bit', there was a chance he wasn't going to be there for only 'a little but'. He couldn't deny that absolute want and _need_ to follow her into the apartment to spend some extra time with her. He was dying for some more intimate alone time because the sexual tension growing between them was beginning to invade every corner of his mind.

The memories from New Year's Eve were still fresh in his mind and they occupied the space on sleepless nights, leaving more than a little hot and bothered. Every time he saw her, he couldn't help but want to touch her or kiss her. It was driving him a little more than crazy.

He really needed to head home and shower and crawl into bed for some proper sleep…

…but he supposed he could only stay for just a little bit.

Liv smiled and kissed him again as he nodded and she unlocked the door to reveal a dozing Lucy with a bagful of tissues on the floor next to the couch. She woke up when the door to the apartment closed and she sat up, looking apologetic as she tried to fix her hair.

"Sorry, Liv," she looked sheepish as she tried to fully wake herself up. Between being sick, having to take care of a three-year-old and studying, she had to be exhausted. Liv waved off her apology easily and helped her clean her books up.

Rafael stood awkwardly at the entrance before he moved further into the apartment, only half-listening to the two women talking in the living room. His path took him to a door decorated with childish pictures and he could make out light pouring out from underneath the door in the room.

He furrowed his brow and peeked in the door, seeing Noah not in bed (like Liv suspected on the way back) and playing with some of his toys on the floor. He looked behind him at the sound of the door, looking like he got caught doing something he wasn't supposed to. But his face brightened at just the sight of him and his heart soared in his chest when the toddler ran at him with open arms.

"Baba! You eat?"

"Yeah, I ate. Aren't you supposed to be asleep?"

Noah pursed his lips, wisely trying to avoid that question as he played with the collar of his shirt. He hummed and pressed his forehead against Rafael's, giggling when he planted a kiss on the side of his head.

"That's what I thought," Rafael tickled his side as he walked to the bed and dropped him down onto the mattress, throwing the covers over his little body.

"You read me?"

Noah pointed towards a small book shelf next to his closet, holding a plethora of children's books along with some trinkets and a picture of him and his mom. Rafael didn't hesitate to travel to the shelf and grabbed one at random.

"Alright, you get one story but then you have to sleep, deal?"

Noah nodded enthusiastically and moved closer to him as he sat down on the edge of the bed. He made sure Noah was cuddled up before he began.

Meanwhile, Liv had tried, but failed miserably to get Lucy to spend the night because she didn't want to send the poor, sick girl home alone this late at night. But the girl was stubborn and ultimately sucked it up, leaving the apartment with a check and promise to be there the next morning, bright and early.

Liv watched her until she disappeared down the hall before she closed and locked the door, kicking off her heels. She stretched her toes and enjoyed the feeling of the hardwood against her feet, still feeling warm and happy from the copious amount of wine she consumed. She was about to consume one more glass, hopefully with Rafael.

Speaking of, she looked around the immediate room and wondered he even went. She didn't see him leave and the guest bathroom door was opened and the light was off. However, the room directly across from it was lit up. Which meant Noah was probably still awake.

She threw her hair up in a clip she took with her in her clutch and pinned her hair back, deciding to go check up on them before she went for the wine.

Liv walked into the room just as Rafael was quietly sliding the book back into its slot on the shelf as Noah slept cuddled into the blankets on his bed. He waved her out and shut the lights off, closing the door behind him.

"He wanted me to read him a story. Hope you don't mind," he explained, touching her hip as he moved out of the hallway and back into the living room. Liv followed but bee lined into the kitchen and grabbing for nearest glass.

"You can read him a bed time story anytime you want."

He smirked and watched as she opened a fresh bottle of wine and he gave her a confused look. She just shrugged her shoulders and asked him if he wanted any, to which he agreed to a glass. His eyes found the stove clock behind her.

"I can't stay for long. I'm going to need to be fresh for court in the morning," he remarked, watching as she nodded in understanding and sent him a flirtatious wink.

"I know you need your beauty sleep."

"You're so funny."

"I know," she teased back and circled around the counter. She wrapped an arm around his shoulders and enjoyed his closeness, feeling his body against her. She didn't think she'd ever tire of this kind of thing with him. He was just so comfortable and it made her feel comfortable, too.

"How humble you are. Next to being beautiful, that has to be your most charming trait."

She blushed a bit at his comment, not used to hearing such candid words from him quite yet. He was very vocal in what he liked and didn't like, so she shouldn't have found it so surprising that he was vocal about her. Using words like beautiful and gorgeous weren't new to her, per say. It was just new hearing it so often.

It usually made her feel wanted and warm inside. Now, it was only making her body heat up with arousal.

"I really need to get going…we've got to be ready and prepped for this guy in the morning. I don't want him bailing out of jail after what he did."

Liv agreed but whined a bit when he pulled out of her embrace and took a few more parting sips of the glass. He set in on the counter and pulled her towards the door, waiting for her to deposit her glass as well.

"You can stay the night," she suggested as they stopped by the front door. He had his back to the door and he gave her a look.

"You and I both know what's going to happen if I stay here, tonight," he smiled as she couldn't help but agree with him.

"I know and I wouldn't mind it in the least," she shot back and sauntered closer to him, taking advantage of the fact that he had nowhere to run away from her as her hand brushed against the front of his pants. Rafael bit back a moan, feeling her hand massaging him through his pants. It felt way to good and he wanted her to keep going.

But he was trying to be responsible and think about their work in the morning. Liv's lips attached to his neck, nipping and sucking and all those thoughts about being an adult disintegrated as she slid down to floor.

Her knees made a soft thump and her hands immediately flew to his belt buckle and undid it in record time. He swallowed the lump in his throat, feeling himself stir and become more and more aroused as her fingers deftly undid the button of his pants.

Rafael panted as he felt his pants pooling around his ankles, revealing his boxer briefs to Liv's lusty eyes. He damn near keeled over when she licked her lips and brought her hands up to the waist band. In one swift yank, he was exposed to her and the air of the apartment.

He didn't have the time to contemplate anything as her hand closed over him and ran up his length, causing a moan to burst from his throat at the sensation. God, how long had he been dreaming of this now and it was becoming a reality? Shit, he needed to calm down or it was going to be over before it even started.

He did his best to regulate his breathing but he gasped, his heart seizing in his chest as he felt her hot mouth close around him suddenly, lips dragging up the shaft and moan providing delicious vibrations that traveled through his dick and into his body. He could feel it in his bones, it was so good.

She worked him for a few minutes, occasionally using her hand and pulling away for breath and he kept his body pressed against the apartment door the entire time, using it as an anchor so he didn't float away from the ecstasy coursing through his veins.

Eventually, with a warning, he climaxed with a barely concealed moan, arching off the door as Liv held his hips, doing her best to keep him from surging forward. She pulled away and pulled up his boxer briefs, followed by his pants and belt, which she helped secure before she stood up again and leaned into him.

Rafael, who was still reeling from the orgasm he just had standing in front of her front door, accepted her soft kiss, contradicting the unbearably sexy act she just committed.

"Fuck," he finally whispered, standing up straighter and reaching for her body. He hotly tugged at her lip with his teeth and pushed one of his hands up underneath her dress to slid up her thigh.

"We don't have time," she reminded him, loving the feeling of his hand sliding between her legs. She giggled uncharacteristically as his lips traveled down her neck, murmuring sexy things against her skin that did nothing but turn her on even more.

She didn't resist when switched their positions and pushed her against the door. She certainly didn't mind when he sank to his knees in front of her and pulled her lace panties down her legs. She took the initiative to throw one of her legs over his shoulder as his head disappeared under the skirt of the dress and a hot tongue made contact with her already wet sex.

It was her turn to moan and arch against the door, feeling just how skilled the man's mouth truly was. His hands joined in the mix, sliding into her as his lips and tongue worked tirelessly to bring her to a hard orgasm.

She nearly fell over with how hard her peak hit her, but one of his hands held onto her waist as her both of her hands gripped useless at the frame of the door on the wall. He worked her until she moved her hips away, signaling that she was done.

When his face reappeared, he wiped at his mouth and gave her the smuggest smile he could muster, which she wanted to smack right off his face.

"You're amazing," was what fell out of her mouth instead. The two shared a few more sexy kisses, holding each other before they truly realized just how much time had passed.

"So much for getting a good night's rest," he commented dryly, but only received a swift smack on his ass because of it. He glanced at the woman behind him and she shrugged her shoulders, feeling more relaxed than she had felt in weeks. She would sleep good tonight, regardless of how many hours she actually got.

She knew he would, too.

"Quit complaining," she joked as he opened her front door, prepared to leave for the night. She gave him one last kiss before she sent him off and watched him leave with another dreamy smile on her face.

Those dreamy smiles were happening more and more frequently and she didn't know if that was a good or bad thing. They certainly conveyed what she was feeling on the inside, but she was finding she had a lack of control over them.

She decided to dwell on it in the morning, opting to take a hot shower and slide into bed.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/ N: I apologize for the short chapter and being gone in general. I've been so incredibly busy, it's not even funny anymore. I still don't know where I'm going with this story, but for now, I've planned on just making it straight up fluff with some juicy M rated material squished between. I hope you guys are still enjoying this fic and don't worry, because I'm working hard on my other fics as well! Enjoy!

It was a little cold to be on the playground at 6 p.m. during the week day in early March, but it was a last-minute trip and Liv couldn't refuse Noah's excited face.

That was her fault for putting on speaker phone when Amanda called, but in her defense, that jar of pickles was giving her hell and she couldn't concentrate on holding a phone at the same time. Had she known the woman was about to invite her and Noah to the park and out for a quick dinner, all thanks to Carisi, she would have taken the call into a different room and turned them down.

But alas, her son had been standing just feet away, showing her his latest drawing and had overheard the word playground. It was over from that moment and Liv had resigned herself to her fate. Sitting on a cold park bench at 6 p.m., bundled up in her thickest coat and sipping some hot chocolate next to Amanda, who was doing the same.

The park was abandoned at that time of day, the sun setting and prompting the street and park lights to come on. They would have to get going soon, but she was enjoying watching Noah having a good time, especially since she was able to goad a certain someone to give up some of his prep time to join them.

Seeing Rafael run around a snowy park in his expensive shoes and clothing was an odd experience for both Amanda and Carisi, but she had grown used to seeing his goofy, playful side thanks to her son. Her three-year-old was probably the only person who could do such a thing to such a masked, private man.

"So how long have you two been dating?"

Liv groaned at the question, knowing it was bound to come up in their pleasant conversation and she'd been dreading it. There was no denying that the squad knew and they'd more than likely knew for a while now. It wasn't as troublesome as she originally thought it was going to be but she didn't appreciate the knowing smiles and nods of approval.

True, she didn't feel like she had to hide anything anymore, but the lines between professional and personal didn't need to be blurred when it came to her detectives and her. However, since they weren't in the office, she felt like she could answer honestly as friends would.

"Since the first of the year. Not that long but it feels like it's been years," she sipped at her chocolate and waved at Noah who was clawing at the air for help as Rafael picked him up and slung him over his shoulder. Amanda chuckled and waved over at Jesse, who was cooing from her baby swing Carisi was gently pushing.

"Sort of have been years, even if you two weren't exclusive."

Liv sent her a confused, sideways glance but shrugged it off. Her eyes slid over to the adorable baby giggling on the swing, smirking when Carisi bent over to make silly faces at her.

"Something you should be telling me?"

Amanda wrinkled her nose and shook her head, crossing her ankles as she continued to watch them.

"No way. Carisi is a friend and nothing more. But Jesse loves him and he loves her. He's kind of stepped in and…ya know…"

"I get that," Liv nodded, happy and respectful of the relationship between the two. Amanda's mess with Nick threw a wrench into the dynamic between everyone and she was happy that the woman was keeping it out of the work place. She had no ideas about her dating life, but she hoped she found some happiness.

"Besides, he's got a crush on Mark Edwards down in homicide. The guy with the full head of a grey hair? The cute one?"

"I always thought he kind of had a thing for Julie at the front desk."

"He does."

"Well," Liv chuckled, "At least he has good taste."

They sat in companionable silence for a few more minutes before Noah broke the piece and sprinted towards Liv, giggling like mad as Rafael chase after him. Liv obliged Noah's pleas to get behind her, using him as a human shield to get away from the man still trying to get after him.

"Nice to know you'd use me as a shield, buddy," Liv joked, reaching behind to tickle him a little as Rafael slowed to a stop to catch his breath. Carisi chuckled at the joke, joining them with Jesse bouncing happily on his hip.

"Get a work out, Counselor?"

"First one in a year," he ground out, coughing a bit as the cold air stung his lungs. Liv snorted, not doubting that statement. The man lived like a frat boy with take-out, alcohol and coffee taking up most of his meal times. It was no wonder he loved it when she cooked for them or why he always volunteered to make dinner.

"Well, looks like you'll be getting them more often, I see," Carisi winked, much to Barba's chagrin and backed off after the small glare he directed towards him. Liv admonished him silently, but smiled when he leaned down and kissed her on the lips. Then, she was shocked he even did that in front of two of her squad members.

"What," he acknowledged her widened eyes and parted lips, "You said they already know about us."

"I just didn't take you for the PDA type," she commented back. Noah had settled behind her, so she stood up and leaned a little closer to him. Amanda followed suit, reaching for Jesse who was smiling and gurgling with barely formed words.

"I'm not…just felt like doing it. Can you blame me?"

She blushed a little at the candid comment but rewarded him with a little more of a sensual kiss while the others were distracted for the moment. He hummed against her lips, bringing up his thumb to stroke her cheek.

"I have to get going," he said gently, lips still hovering above her own. Liv controlled her sad sigh, knowing he was on a time limit. He planned on pulling an all-nighter in his office, against her urging, but that was only because he had to cancel the dinner plans they made in favor of preparing for trial in the morning.

She may have whined a little when she found out (which was so out of character for her as he pointed out), but she understood. There was no room for error with this one and she wanted him to score this win for all of them.

"I'll stop by and bring you some late-night dinner," she stood up, watching Noah jump off the bench and slip in the snow, giggling like crazy. Rafael chuckled and pulled her into a hug, giving her a parting kiss before he plucked Noah up and said his goodbyes. The little boy was a bit heartbroken and he let it be known as soon as Rafael set him back on his feet.

"Please…," Noah knit his eyebrows together, his arms dangling pathetically at his sides. Rafael chuckled and leaned down in front of him, whispering something in his ear. Liv watched with interest, wondering what they were talking about as Noah giggled and nodded excitedly, giving him another big hug.

"Hey, Liv, wanna join us for some pizza? I've been craving Vito's for a while now," Rollins slung the baby bag over her shoulder, making faces at Jesse who was being bounced in Carisi's arms as they waited for her answer. Noah intercepted and answered for them, jumping up and down and getting way more excited about it than she'd ever seen him for a slice of pie.

"I guess that answers that," she laughed, feeling Rafael's hand slid down her back and rest on her hip as he pressed another kiss on her cheek.

"I like extra cheese," he whispered in her ear, smirking heavily when she elbowed him. He turned on his heel, making sure the snow was brushed off his coat and pants, heading back in the direction of his office.

"I'll call you later," she called out, grabbing a hold of Noah's hand as their small group prepared to leave to the pizza place. She smiled when he glanced behind him and winked at her.

* * *

"I just gotta say it…couple of the year."

Liv rolled her eyes and took another slice of pizza from the tray, careful not to knock over her beer in the process. Noah sat next to her, transfixed on the screen of her phone as he silently played his favorite game, kicking his feet under his chair. He'd been so excited for pizza and he hadn't even gotten through his first slice yet.

"Don't let him hear you say that. You'll be a pile of ash in your seat if he does," Liv warned Carisi, finding it funny that she wasn't lying. It was a miracle he even let others see him get down in the snow and play with her little boy, let alone kiss her in front of them, and she didn't want anyone ruining that.

"I'm just surprised he's that…animated with Noah. I didn't think he was comfortable around kids at all."

Rollins would have hit the nail on the head had this been Liv's first time seeing the two interact, but now it was so normal, it would be weird not seeing it every time he came around. The two were turning thick as thieves before her very eyes.

"When are you going to disclose?"

That question completely threw her off and she realized that she hadn't even thought of that idea whatsoever. That was odd for her, because disclosure was always on the forefront of her mind when dating someone. Mostly, because she was always dating someone on the police force. However, just because Rafael wasn't an officer, didn't mean she didn't have to disclose it to the higher up's. It was just, if not more, important that they know of a relationship between an ADA and a Lieutenant who worked in close quarters on numerous cases.

"Haven't talked about it yet," she answered around another bite of pizza. How would she even approach the idea? She had no doubt in her mind that this relationship was going somewhere and quick if her gut feelings were anything to go by, but would he even be open to disclosure? Is that why they hadn't talked about it yet?

"Well, I'd do it soon. God forbid, Dodds finds out and both of you are sunk," Amanda reminded her. Dodds. The man would do it, too, but not out of ill-will. They all had policies to keep and duties that had be done. The thought that not disclosing the relationship could lead to another transfer (ironically, Rafael was the one who inadvertently had her transferred after he told her bosses about her a Tucker, but that was forgiven in time) scared her. Their dynamic, as an officer of the law and an officer of the court, was impeccable.

Was this going to ruin everything? The reputation their team had brought upon themselves…would it be tarnished if worst came to worst and one of them had to decide if they were going to resign?

She wasn't feeling hungry anymore.

This was the kind of thing that could keep her up late and night, worrying and thinking so much about all the negatives, she refused to look at the positives. It was what had stopped her so many times before, when she would think of him as more than just a friend on a lonely night in her cold apartment.

In any case, whatever possible outcome, she knew they would have to talk about it and soon. Part of her wanted to get it over with, but another part wanted to keep the fairy tale alive for a little longer. Let them live in their blissful ignorance of the future until reality came crashing in. Except, she didn't know which scenario would be worst.

"Liv? I didn't mean to make you nervous or anything?"

She must have looked scared out of her mind, because Amanda patted her arm and tried catching her eye. Sonny looked on, Jesse now seated in his lap and picking at his half-eaten slice on his plate. She shook her head and reassured her.

"Don't worry about it."

Liv smiled and changed the subject, mind wandering over to her man in his office, sifting through documents and, hopefully, looking forward to his late-night dinner she promised.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Light SMUT warning ahead! I tried my best to write some smut, but I'm afraid it's awkward and it sucks, so I apologize. Also, this story is coming to close. There's not much conflict that happens between them, and that's fine because I just want them to be fluffy and cute for once in my writing. Anyway, enjoy this chapter and thanks for reading!

Rafael woke to the sound of his cell phone buzzing erratically on his nightstand.

Glancing at the clock, he swore and swiped it up, knowing he had a good two more hours of sleep before he absolutely had to be out of bed. Whoever was calling him this early was about to get an earful. He didn't bother checking the name on the screen.

"What."

There was silence before a familiar voice filled his ear and he immediately calmed down, feeling bad as Liv apologized.

"No, no it's fine. Sorry, I didn't know it was you…everything ok?"

" _Not really. I'm out of a babysitter for today. Lucy's aunt is in the hospital and she had to drive up to Connecticut today. So, Noah's going to have to tag along with me to the office, but there's a small problem with that…"_

"What," he asked, trying to keep his eyes opened long enough so he could listen to her. He was definitely going to have to go back to sleep after this or else he was going to be a total ass in court later on.

" _My squad and I have a meeting with Dodds in his office today…for some reason he wants all of us there. In any case, it's at 9 o'clock and there's no way Noah is going to sit still for an hour or two. I was wondering if maybe he could hang around your office until I'm finished? It's fine you're not comfortable…"_

Rafael smiled, hearing the nervousness in her voice for even asking him. Had he not been exposed so much to the toddler so much, he would have immediately turned her down. But, Noah playing such an integral part in their relationship, and his everyday life now, he'd grown so comfortable around the child, he missed him when he wasn't around.

"Of course he can. He's been asking for Baba time anyway, has he not?"

" _Oh, trust me, he asks every day."_

Rafael chuckled, "I'll see you first thing. Love you."

He was about to hit the end call button when his eyes shot open and his heart almost seized in his chest. He could only faintly make out the sound of a sharp intake of breath, but dead silence fell through their phones and he struggled to come up with something, anything to say.

Did he really just say that? Did he really just tell her he loved her? He did, that wasn't a lie. But, he hadn't meant to say it like that, in that way, while he was half asleep and she was asking him to babysit her son for a few hours.

She still hadn't spoken a word and he hadn't either, so he cleared his throat, "Liv…I'm sorry. I didn't-"

" _I love you, too."_

Rafael sat straight up, phone pressed to his ear as the adrenaline pumped through his body. Screw another two hours of sleep, he was wide awake now. He breathed deeply a few times, listening to Liv doing much of the same.

"You do?"

The words fell from his mouth with an air of disbelief and utter hope surrounding them. This was a moment he'd been thinking about for a while now; it was the first thing he thought about in the morning and the last thing he thought about before sleep took him. He mulled over how he was going to tell her he loved her and whether not it was too early.

Three months in to a relationship was rather quick, but he'd never felt so strongly for someone before. It was scary how much when he really took a step back and looked at it.

" _Yeah…I have for a while I think."_

He grinned from ear-to-ear, falling back against his bed and feeling like he was floating on a cloud instead of his expensive mattress. It was the most incredible and indescribable feeling at nearly five in the morning and the uncontrollable need to see her, to kiss her, to hold her was making his legs itch with movement.

"Well…this is not how I imagined it would go down…but I'm glad it did."

* * *

Liv folded her legs up and bit her lip, a silly smile on her face in the darkness of her bedroom. Oh, what she would give to be in his arms right now…

"Me too."

They only spent a few more minutes on the phone, both chatting aimlessly before she felt sleep pulling at her and their declaration of love still making her head spin. She was finding that to be a theme in their relationship. From their first, drunk night together, all the way up till just now, everything had been unpredictable and fun and she was finding that her past relationships hadn't been like that.

She loved it, if she were being honest.

Liv turned over on her side and dreamily drifted off for another two hours of sleep. When she woke, she woke with silly smile on her face that radiated for the rest of the morning. Through her shower, through a quick breakfast and even through the slow walk to the court house (Noah did his best to keep up but his little legs could only move so fast), she could hear his voice echoing in her mind, those three little words she'd been wanting to tell him for so long now.

It was an odd feeling, though, because they'd only been together a good four months now and she wasn't used to moving that fast in relationships. But, the big difference she found was that she'd never felt this strongly this early on for anyone. So, maybe this wasn't as crazy as it seemed.

In any case, the smile on her face was still present on her face when they made it to his office and Noah bolted from her side, all but screaming Rafael's name and throwing himself at the man. Rafael dropped the file he'd been reading and intercepted the ball of energy, immediately attacking the toddler with the dreaded claw hand and causing him to laugh uncontrollably.

"I'm a little hurt he's never that excited to see me," she joked, setting Noah's backpack on the floor by the desk. Rafael pulled Noah into his side and nudged his forehead with his own.

"It's because we're best friends," he stated, as if it was the simplest explanation in the world. Liv snorted and leaned into kiss Noah on the forehead and Rafael on the lips.

"I have to get going or else Dodds will have my head," she looked at Noah, "Behave for Raf. He has some work to do, ok?"

"'kay mommy."

"Alright, I'll see you later. I love you."

"You talking to me or him?"

The question caused an eruption of butterflies in her stomach and she glanced behind her with a sly smile, catching Rafael's quirked eyebrow and narrowed eyes, almost daring her to say no to that question. She thought about joking with him but decided against it.

"Both of you," she shrugged and flipped her hair over shoulder, leaving his office without looking back. If she had, she would have saw the love struck, stupid grin on her boyfriend's face.

* * *

The meeting was uneventful and Dodds droning on about numbers and regulations and what have you was not her idea of a good time. She was itching to get back over to the court house so she could steal a few moments with her son and boyfriend before she would need to get some work done that day.

When the meeting adjourned, she packed up her notes and waited for the rest of squad outside of the room, who were taking their sweet time in getting their stuff around. She answered a few texts, one from Lucy, who was giving her notice about when she would be back in town and one from Rafael, who kept sending her adorable pictures of him and Noah throughout the meeting. She set one of them as her lock screen as soon as she got one.

"Melissa! Wait!"

Liv looked up from her phone to see a man standing just feet away from her, watching as a young woman in tears walking away from him and not looking back. The guy sighed heavily, defeated and turned around. Liv quirked an eyebrow, recognizing the young officer from homicide.

"Oh, sorry, Lieutenant…"

"Everything ok?"

The guy, Michaels, shook his head and took a seat on one of the plastic chairs outside of office where her squad still was and shoved his head in his hands.

"My girlfriend just got transferred out of homicide and shoved into a completely different precinct because we didn't disclose our relationships. Someone saw us and snitched to IAB and 1PP."

Liv felt a sickening feeling sinking in her stomach as she watched the young man stare at the floor, and couldn't help but instantly think of Rafael. She glanced at her phone screen, seeing his smiling face pressed against her son's giggling one. She could tell he was being tickled and loving every second of it.

"I'm so sorry," she choked out, feeling almost short of breath. How she'd gone this long without feeling this, she wasn't sure, but this should have been at the forefront of her mind the moment she realized she was in love with Rafael. But, she'd been having so much fun and enjoying her time with him the idea just kind of…drifted to the back of her thoughts.

She didn't hear the thank you from Michaels while her squad filed out of the room, Carisi and Amanda arguing something or another and Fin speaking on the phone to someone with a big smile on his face. They didn't seem to notice the internal crisis happening in her head at that moment, but she was grateful for that. She thought about it all the way back to the court house, where she picked up Noah and talked Rafael into grabbing a quick cup of coffee from the cart just a few feet away outside.

"How was the meeting?"

"Don't get me started," she smiled softly, sipping form her cup, "Busy tonight?"

He shook his head, helping Noah pull back the tab on his little cup of hot chocolate before he grabbed his own coffee, "No. Your place?"

"Yeah. Pizza for dinner?"

"You read my mind."

She sneaked a quick kiss and pulled Noah away, leaving towards her office with the promise to see him later at her apartment. She knew what she had to do tonight and it scared her, but she was ready. She thanked Michaels and all his turmoil (that sounded bad) for waking her from her reality. It had to be done and she was resigned to that. She only hoped she was met with a positive response.

* * *

Nearly twelve hours later, Noah was tucked away, dead asleep. He ate more pizza than they originally thought and promptly fell asleep as soon as bath time was done and over with. He loved seeing the little boy and he couldn't get enough of their time together, but he was glad the boy was asleep in his bed, leaving him and Liv to their own devices and allowing this to happen.

Her moans filled the living room of her apartment and he hadn't ever been happier.

Here, face between her legs and giving her everything she asked as she writhed and bucked above him. One leg was over his shoulder and the other was bent and pushed up, opening her to him as he continued to ravage her body. His erection strained against his pants and he grinded against the couch pathetically, too focused on her pleasure to really think about his that much.

Never, in his life, had he had such a good time during sex like this. Usually, it was a chore. All he wanted from a partner before was to fool around, get his and go. It was the life of a man who barely had time to think about love let alone sex because he was too busy working and networking within the legal community. Sure, he had relationships in the past, but they didn't work out and for good reason.

"Mmm, fuck," Liv sobbed, fingernails biting into the couch cushions while her back arched and legs twitched. She came down from her high gloriously, whimpering and relaxing back against the leather, her skin sweaty and her eyes closed, breathing labored and looking beautiful.

Rafael climbed up her body and pressed sweet kisses to her lips and face, enjoying the feeling of being the one to make her feel this way. Him. He was responsible for this and he couldn't help the manly swell of pride blossoming in his chest. Screw his pleasure…this was reward enough for him.

"Why is your mouth so good," she moaned, pulling him close and dragging her lips down his neck. Her legs were still spread and his body fit in like a puzzle piece. He growled when she wrapped her legs around his back and started to unbutton his shirt, revealing more and more of his chest the lower she went.

God, he was so wound up and he wanted nothing more than to-

"I think it's time we disclose."

Her hands froze the same time his eyes popped open and he pulled away from her, her legs unlocking and sliding down his sides. She looked like she said something she shouldn't have or didn't mean to.

It fell silent between them and he was honestly shocked for a second. Of course, the thought of disclosing their relationship crossed his mind every day, but he was so intent on making sure she was comfortable and he was giving her everything she wanted, he simply never brought the topic up.

Also, he wasn't afraid to admit that he was too scared to ask because he of the answer she might give. Disclosing was going to happen in a relationship like theirs when there was something there worth fighting for. He hadn't a reason to doubt Liv's feelings, but he was constantly second guessing himself that he was enough for her.

"Sorry…I didn't mean to kill the mood. But, after this morning and going all day feeling like I was walking on a cloud…I just think it's the right time."

Her fingers played nervously with one of the buttons as her breathing still calmed from her mind-numbing climax just a few moments earlier. He stilled her hand, their eyes connecting with a sudden seriousness that almost sucked the air out of the room.

"There are…risks involved, however."

Rafael nodded, "I know. One of us would have to resign, worst case scenario. Or, I'd have to leave SVU and take over in a different area."

"Or they'd just transfer me."

"No," he shook his head, "I wouldn't let that happen. I did it once before and that kind of ruined our entire relationship, remember?"

Liv smiled slightly, "It wasn't all your fault. I didn't disclose when I should have…although it wasn't that serious between Tucker and me to begin with."

"Ugh, let's not bring his name up."

"Anyway," she shoved his hand playfully, "If you don't want to, I get it. We can continue to do this secretly. I don't mind, just as long as we both know the risks involved."

But Rafael wasn't even worried about the consequences of letting their relationship be known. Half the time, he wanted to shout it from the highest point in the city that he was in love with her and hell, he was tempted to when

"Ok," he smiled, "Let's do it."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I'll put my resignation in right then and there if they want me to, I don't care. You and Noah mean so much to me…more than I ever could have thought."

Liv blinked a few times, giggling as she tried to hold back the happy tears threatening to fall. She pulled him into a hug and it was a little awkward because he was still on his knees between her legs and she was naked, but it was perfect.

"First thing in the morning," he whispered into her ear and kissed her neck, sighing into the embrace like he found where he was supposed to be all along. And he knew that's where he was supposed to be and he wasn't going to let that go.

"I love you," she whispered, kissing him passionately, their mood returning full force as her hands finished unbuttoning his shirt and slipping if off his shoulders. Her fingers traveled through his chest hair, all the way down to the belt that kept his pants secure. She slipped it off in record time as well and undid his pants with precision. He sighed into her mouth, his arousal growing with every move she made.

"I want you so bad," she whispered, hand dipping into his pants and wrapping it around his painfully hard erection. He groaned into her mouth, opening his eyes to meet her lust filled ones. He licked at her lip, capturing them in a kiss.

"Are you sure? I thought we were taking it slow."

"Your head between my legs is taking it slow?"

"Good point."

She chuckled and pushed him away so she could stand. She grabbed his hand and helped him up off the floor, leaving their clothes scattered around the furniture so she could lead him down the hall to her open bedroom. The moment the door closed behind him, he was pushed back towards her bed and pinned to the mattress, her hips straddling his and she didn't waste any time rubbing her wet slit against his straining bulge.

"I fucking love you," he moaned, hands gripping her hips as she picked up a tantalizingly slow grind. He enjoyed the way her head fell back, her hair falling over her shoulder and her moans that ricocheted off the walls of her room. He held back the needy growls in favor for reaching his hands up her shirt and slipping his fingers under her bra, feeling her breasts against the palms of his hands.

Liv helped in shucking off the shirt and unhooking her bra, giving him a much better. He flipped them over suddenly, attacked her chest with his mouth, tongue and teeth teasing her nipples while his fingers traced her nether lips with blind accuracy. She bucked against his hand, damn near pleading for him to stop teasing her.

Eventually, he pulled away to see her body, flushed and waiting as he pushed his slacks and underwear down his legs, exposing his rigid flesh. Liv eyed it with a lick of her lips, her hips writhing against the bed in want. He was back on her and inside of her before he knew it, hands propping him up above her as they moved together in a fast rhythm. There would be time later for slow, passionate sex, but the crazy need to remember their first night together was what would drive them tonight.

Later, they lay curled under her blanket, Liv softly snoring while he brushed back her sweaty hair and enjoying the closeness of her naked body to his. He knew he should be fast asleep in preparation for tomorrow, but he couldn't bring himself to close his eyes just yet.

He lie there for another hour, watching her sleep before he slipped into a peaceful slumber himself.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Ok! One more chapter and this story will be coming to an end! I hope you enjoy this chapter! I don't own SVU or any of it's characters. ENJOY.

Their moans were the only noise in the quiet apartment during the early hours of the morning.

She gripped the headboard, face contorted in pleasure and hanging on for dear life as her climax ripped through her body with vicious intent, causing her body to tremble and her voice to crack. Rafael's hands that gripped her hips pulled her back against his body as he followed with her, managing to keep his pleasured moans to low grunts.

They fell back against the mattress, still joined together, but on their sides as they cuddled in their post-orgasmic haze. They had a good two hours before their workdays were to start, and another hour before Noah usually woke up in the morning. It left them with enough time to just lay there in silence, enjoying the quiet of her bedroom.

"I love you," he said after a bit and Liv turned in his grasp and laid small kisses along his jaw until she reached his waiting lips. She wasn't ever going to get tired of hearing those words from his mouth, especially since she'd been wanting to tell him for the longest time. Now, she could do it all she wanted to.

"I love you, too. I would love you even more if you made us all breakfast," she whispered against his lips. He chuckled and pulled her body on top of his as he shifted over to his back. Liv sunk her face into his neck, licking and nipping at the sweaty skin there.

"Since when did you get so good at manipulating me?"

"I only manipulate you when I want a foot rub or when I don't feel like cleaning up after dinner," she explained, "Plus, you're way better at cooking then I am and you know how much Noah loves it when you make a smiley face with bacon on his pancakes."

"The things I do for love," he mused, trailing his fingers down her sweaty back. She nuzzled his chin with her nose and straddled his waist, feeling her arousal returning full force. She hadn't expected to feel such a crazy need for him, but she should have known better. Their first drunk night wasn't a jumble of blacked out memories.

Oh, no, she remembered every little dirty detail of what they'd done, and he had as well. So, she may or may not have been incredibly eager to revisit the night that started it all, but that would have to come later. She would need a bottle of Cuervo and whip cream.

It was nearly 45 minutes before they took a quick shower together and Rafael was in the kitchen, whipping up a quick breakfast for everyone. Noah, usually struggling to keep his eyes open after he woke up in the mornings, was alert and standing on a stool next to Rafael, intently watching what he was doing when Liv finally needed her first cup of coffee for the day.

She smiled and watched them for a minute from the hallway, deciding to jump in and grab Noah's arm just as he was about to swing a greasy spatula towards the man's clean slacks. She snatched it out of his hand and kissed his forehead, directing him towards the living room, where the television was playing one of those colorful cartoons he loved so much.

"I wish had your mom reflexes. He got me with a butter knife a couple of minutes ago," he nodded towards his wadded-up dress shirt from the backup bag he kept hidden away in her closet on the counter, "Luckily, I brought extra. However, my tie no longer matches. So, I'll be looking like a wreck all day."

"Well, we have bigger fish to fry, baby."

"Yeah, I sent the D.A. a text, requested a meeting first thing. I'm guessing you did the same with Dodds?"

Liv nodded and sipped at the coffee she made, "He pretty much already guessed it. The rumor mill is vicious. That little video from New Year's also made its way to his phone, as well, so he said it was a matter of time before I came forward."

"On the plus side, it won't be as nerve wracking."

"True," she sighed and wrapped her arms around him, resting her head against his cheek, "I'm still anxious. I mean…this could be our last week working together…"

Rafael nodded, thinking the same, but his body wasn't tense and his face betrayed no signs of the anxiety she was feeling. She let go of him long enough so that he could plate pancakes he was making and turn off the stove. Noah was still transfixed with his cartoons and it gave them a minute to talk.

"Worst case scenario, I have to resign. It would suck for everyone involved, but I get offers from private firms all the time. It's not like I'll be stuck looking for a job. I'd probably make more money and work less hours, anyway. But, that's only if the worst-case scenario happens and I have a feeling it won't come to that."

Liv wished she could have felt the same confidence he was, but she didn't. She loved this man with her entire soul and the thought of not being able to work with him like the amazing team they were, put her on edge. She could only hope his good feeling was going to transfer her to at some point before she stepped foot into the Chief's office.

"Stop worrying so much," he kissed her and turned around to grab the plate of pancakes, "Come eat. We have to get going here in a bit."

She sighed and followed him to the table, calling Noah as she grabbed a sippy cup of milk for him. The feeling of deep seated anxiety waned a little throughout breakfast, partially because seeing Noah so excited over his smiley face pancake never failed to make her feel better about life and the world around her in general.

Rafael's beautiful smile thrown into the picture only added to it. She hoped, that after today, this would be her new normal.

* * *

"Chief."

"Lieutenant."

Liv stepped into the office and shut the door, her hands feeling sweaty and shaky. She wiped them discreetly on her slacks, hoping the older man didn't notice as she slid down into one of the comfortable chairs in front of his desk. He finished flipping through whatever papers he was reading before she entered and then slid the glasses off his face, finally looking at her.

His eyes were unreadable and the corners of his mouth were downturned, but she had come to recognize that as the man's thinking face. Had she not known him for some time now, she would have thought he was about to tell her she was fired.

"I already know about you and Mr. Barba, so let's not waste time having you explain it. You're cleared."

Liv sat up straight out of pure shock. Did she just hear him correctly?

"…just like that?"

"No. Not just like that. Not for me, at least. But, for you, yeah. Just like that."

Liv sat forward at the edge of her seat, "I don't understand, Chief."

Dodds sat back in his chair and his eyes traveled from hers to a picture frame facing away from her. It didn't take a genius to realize he was staring back at a picture of his son and Liv felt a sudden sadness bloom in her chest. She always did whenever she thought of Dodds Jr. He was sorely missed by them all.

"I took care of it. That's all you need to know."

"But…why?"

"Because," he started and leaned forward, fingers laced, "You're a good Lieutenant. You're a good person, period. After everything that's happened…you still manage to stay strong and do what's right. Before, I wouldn't have hesitated to boot you out into another precinct just to save the unit a good ADA, but after Mike's death, I've come to realize that you are exactly what this city needs."

Liv felt tears gather in her eyes and she looked away from him, unable to handle the emotional words spilling from his mouth. She pulled it together, not wanting to shed any tears and looked him in the eye as soon as it was safe to do so.

"Thank you, sir," she said softly, swallowing the lump in her throat. So many emotions she'd been feeling before she made it in here were suddenly gone. All her fretting where her career was concerned were for naught. The fact that Dodds had seen feet to take the heat for all of it…

"Don't thank me, yet. The D.A. is one tough son of a bitch. Barba might not be so lucky."

"That's what I'm worried about."

Dodds waved his hand and nodded towards his door, "He'll be fine. I'm sure. Now, I have tons of work to do and so do you. I want to review the witness testimonies for the Smith-Banks trial before defense decides they want to screw us over again."

"You've got it," she smiled and said her goodbyes, promising an e-mail before lunch time. The only thing on her mind as she left 1PP was her boyfriend, who was more than likely still being grilled alive by the D.A. at that very moment.

* * *

She made it to his office in ten minutes flat and asked Carmen how long he'd been gone. The woman had given her a ballpark estimate of thirty minutes and that failed to provide her any comfort. Thirty minutes was a long time for a meeting. An extremely long time when it was about disclosing. That couldn't mean anything good.

Liv sat on the edge of the sofa in his office after letting herself in and she couldn't help her leg bouncing uncontrollably as she stared at the gurgling coffee pot across the way from her.

She put on a fresh pot, knowing Rafael was going to be reaching for it as soon as he got in there. It took only ten more minutes of waiting as she kept herself busy with texts from her squad before Rafael walked in with a grim expression on his face. He closed the door behind him and breathed heavily when their eyes met.

"Hey."

"Hey," she greeted, standing up. He walked past her and set his brief case down by his desk before he shuffled to the coffee pot. He poured himself a cup and, instead of pouring some cream and a little bit of sugar in his cup, he took a huge gulp of it black. That forced her breath to catch in her throat.

Black coffee was never a good sign. That could only mean that the meeting hadn't went well. Liv closed her eyes and hung her head, afraid to break the silence in the room. But, she knew she had to. She had to know what was said.

"Just give it to me straight," she said softly, watching as he turned and looked at her with saddened eyes. He pursed his lips and swirled the black liquid around in the cup, taking a deep and shuddering breath.

"Liv…," he put his cup down and crossed over to her. He laced their fingers together, refusing to meet her eyes. She bit her lip and shook their joined hands, grabbing his attention.

"Tell me."

He was quiet for a long moment and then, "Do you want Italian or Chinese for lunch?"

Liv looked at him, eyebrows knit together in confusion. What did he just say? Why was he smiling?

"I can't decide between pizza and egg rolls."

Liv was taken aback, for the second time that morning. Rafael tried not to burst out into laughter at the scandalized expression on her face, but he couldn't stop his shoulders from shaking.

"The D.A. cleared me."

Liv scoffed and slapped him on the shoulder, "You jackass. You scared the shit out of me!"

She tried shaking his hands off but her grabbed her and pulled her into a hug, laughing into her shoulder. He was so incredibly happy, he felt like he wanted to shout it from the rooftops how in love with this woman he was.

"I couldn't resist. I was cleared, you were cleared…neither of us is losing our jobs, but there are stipulations."

"Such as," she kept her arms wrapped around his neck loosely, relaxing in his embrace.

"You can't testify anymore, unless it's absolutely pertinent to the case and if you do, we have to have supervision for the duration of the case. And if they even suspect we've been talking about the case outside of work, then I'm done for."

"God…I seriously thought they fired you. Easily done. Hell, I won't even go to the hearings if they want."

"Hey, I like it when you go and watch me in action. I know you find it sexy when I get all angry and raise my voice," he kissed her neck and she giggled, pushing him away. It was way too early and way too easy to get carried away. They may have just jumped the biggest hurdle in their relationship yet but they still had a full day of work to get done.

"How did you know I was cleared," she asked after he plucked his cup of coffee back up and settled behind his desk.

"He made it a point of telling me before I even opened my mouth. Dodds called before I got there and had a few words."

Liv shook her head, surprised yet again by the Chief. If she hadn't known any better, she would have thought Dodds was their biggest supporter. However, she was hard-pressed to believe that anyone other than Carisi was rooting as hard for them. What did he say the other day? He was 'shipping' them?

"I can't tell you how relieved I am."

"Me either," he sighed and held out his hand. She slipped hers in his and let him kiss her knuckles before he shooed her away, "Go. I want to take you and Noah to dinner tonight to celebrate, so let's try and get out by five."

"You got it," she mock saluted him and turned to leave. But before she left, she stopped in the doorway and reminded him just how much she loved him. His response had her floating all the way to her office and on a cloud the rest of the day.

"Love you more."


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: THIS IS THE END! This story is coming to a close. Thank you so much to everyone who read, commented and just enjoyed this fic in general. I enjoyed writing it and I'm sad to see it come to an end, but it's nice to finish a fic with a happy ending. I don't own SVU or it's characters. Enjoy and thank you again!

**One Year Later…**

The leaves fell in Central Park, lining the concrete paths as the sun sat low in the sky.

It was the perfect day in mid-September and Rafael couldn't have been happier. It wasn't warm, just chilly enough for a light sweater over their normal short sleeves and the part of the park he chose for this event was nearly abandoned. A few joggers passed by them just a mile back and there was a family playing a friendly game of catch in a clearing.

He rocked their joined hands between them, listening to Liv talk about the latest office gossip and asking for his interpretations and theories. She normally hated to be involved, but she always brought it up when she was trying to wind down for the upcoming weekend. Friday nights were always relaxation nights for them both. Reality television and junk food were their usual methods, but he had managed to talk her into a nice walk through the park tonight instead.

He claimed he wanted some fresh air, but the velvet box in his jean pocket proved otherwise. The simple gold, diamond encrusted band he picked up on his lunch break was everything he hoped for and more when he ordered it. It was also Noah approved, because the little boy had had a huge hand in making the decision. He knew that detail would be important to Liv.

But, damn, he was nervous.

He had no doubt in his mind that she would say yes. His worries didn't lie with her feelings for him. In fact, he didn't really have many worries beyond the workplace. Their lives for the past year had been filled with love and treasured moments, discovery and other things he hadn't experienced before.

They moved in to a new apartment closer to their jobs only two months after they disclosed, taking perhaps the biggest step a relationship could take. Rafael had become Noah's father more or less and the little boy had been testing the waters with identifying him as such. They'd quickly fallen into a routine at home and Rafael had decided that it was time to put it into writing.

Liv had brought up the idea of marriage in passing a few weeks ago, meaning it as a joke, but it was enough for the idea to get stuck in his head and he hadn't been able to think about anything else since.

"…anyway, I'm almost positive Amanda is sleeping with Carisi at this point. There's no way those two haven't at least once."

Rafael grimaced, not wanting to imagine the two doing anything remotely close to that. But, whatever those two decided to do in the privacy of Rollins apartment was their business and theirs alone. He felt Liv cuddle deeper into his side as a gust of wind whipped through the path they walked along.

He felt the nausea rising in his stomach when he realized they nearing the part of their walk where a small, white gazebo sat waiting for them. It was empty, thank God, and he pointed towards it, moving faster. He ended up nearly dragging Liv behind him as she protested.

"What's the deal, Raf?"

"Uh…," he said lamely, gesturing wildly at the empty bench, "…I thought I could take your picture. You look so beautiful today."

Liv couldn't help the cheesy smile as she plopped down on the bench and waited for him to pull out of his phone. He was glad she bought it, because that bought him the slightest bit of time to cool his growing anxiety. Really, it was rather annoying he was getting all flustered over this. It wasn't like she was going to say no.

…right?

He snapped a few pictures, immediately saving one of them as his wallpaper. Liv went to stand, but he stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.

"Wait," he choked out, sliding his phone back into one of his pockets. Liv looked at him questioningly, searching his green eyes and expecting something there, but he knew he was giving her a blank stare.

_Damnit, just do it!_

He swallowed the lump in his throat as he dropped down to one knee in front of her, folding her hands in his and resting them on her lap. Her eyes grew wide and tears sprung to them suddenly, her bottom lip trembling as she realized what he was about to do. Rafael took a few calming breaths, but he couldn't stop his own onslaught of tears gathering in his eyes. The love he felt for this woman sitting in front of him was almost overwhelming at times.

"Raf," she said quietly, squeezing his hands. He smiled and sniffed, letting go of one of her hands to grab the box in his pocket, nearly dropping it on the wooden floor of the gazebo.

"Liv. There are no words to describe how happy I am when I'm with you. I never thought I was ever going to find someone who could put up with me and deal with all of my demons…but when I met you and I fell in love with you, I knew you could and would and you have. And not a day goes by that I'm not thankful to have you and Noah in my life. I love the both of you will all of my heart and…I want to make it official."

His fingers trembled as he struggled to open the box, his entire body nearly shaking and it wasn't from the cold breeze that swept through the park. It was from the way Liv looked at him like he was the only thing that mattered at that moment.

"Will you marry me," he whispered, loud enough for her and only her to hear. She nodded through her tears and sniffled loudly, chuckling as she held her ring finger so he could slide the band on. She had to reach out and help him, because his own hand shook so violently, he nearly missed it.

"I love you," he pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her waist. He stayed on his knee, uncaring that the wood was uncomfortable and the dirty floor was probably going to stain his jeans. He held Liv until she pulled back, eyes clearer and observing the band that would decorate her ring finger from that point on.

"It's beautiful," she said and he smiled as he stood. He helped her off the bench and circled his arms around her once more.

"Noah helped pick it out."

"Noah? The little boy that can't keep a secret to save his life?"

"Yeah," Rafael mused, "I may have promised him a trip to Disney for his silence."

"You're willing to sacrifice a week of walking around a giant park filled with cheerful cartoon characters and buying overpriced mouse ears and souvenirs?"

"That's how much I love you," he pressed his forehead to hears, his heart beating hard in his chest when she whispered them back, just like it always did.

**Six Months Later…**

The crashing waves of the ocean along their private, beach front rental was something she'd never grow tired of hearing. She'd contemplated moving to a costal place like this in a far off, distant part of her past, but the city was her home and it would remain that way.

The noise and even the most unsavory smells had a place in her heart, forever and always, but their honeymoon destination was quickly rising in the ranks. Liv breathed in the salty air and played with the ring on her finger, twisting it and smiling softly as it rubbed against her skin.

She'd been wearing it for almost a week now and she was surprised at how quickly she'd grown used to having it sit there. Although, she did catch herself playing it with way too often and the decision to string it through a necklace and wear it under her shirt during work was unanimous. Rafael had decided on that as well, because he was worse than she was with it.

They left back to the city tomorrow, and she honestly couldn't wait to see Noah again, but she would miss the time alone. This was the first time this vacation where she bothered to put on any semblance of clothing and she'd felt completely free for the first time in a long time.

"Livvy," Rafael said as he opened the sliding door to the patios she stood on. He padded softly over to her, the ice in his cup sloshing against the glass. A glass of red wine appeared in front of her and a strong arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her back against him.

"Bags are packed," he whispered in her ear. She hummed in response, eyes never leaving the waves lapping at the shore of the beach. She wanted to walk along the wet sand one more time and stretch her toes.

"I don't want to leave but I can't wait to see our baby," she sighed, tipping her head back against his shoulder. He kissed her neck and sighed.

"I know. I miss him crawling in between us at night and waking up with toes in my nose."

She chuckled, knowing he meant every word of what he said. She missed Noah, but Rafael missed him even more. Those two were practically best friends and she knew it was hard for him to leave the little boy with Lucia at the airport. Especially, since Noah was a master at emotional manipulation. The tears were real in Rafael's eyes and it made her fall that much more in love with him, if that was even possible.

"Tomorrow night. It'll be all back to normal."

"I like our normal."

She did, too. Even though they didn't work together anymore, they still had important work across the city. Rafael eventually moved into the private sector, leaving SVU in capable hands with some ADA out of Chicago. Liv was still working the streets, hard as ever, but she was slowly but surely finding herself behind the desk more, overseeing her detectives and making sure things were running smoothly with the unit.

Those changes were big and new in their lives, but it was for the best and it had been working in their favor so far. Plus, those changes provided them with way more family time, which wasn't something she could ever argue with. The more family time the better.

Rafael drained his glass and moved out from behind her. Liv furrowed her brow as she watched him over her wine glass, seeing him walk lazily down the stairs of the patio and down to where the waves lapped at the shore. He turned to her and she could see him wave her over to him, despite his face being hidden by the setting sun behind him.

"Dance with me?"

She hummed and set her glass on the ledge and quickly followed him down the stairs and to the shore. The warm breeze blew up the bottom of her dress as she met him, taking his outstretched hand

"With what music," she asked, her feet sinking into the wet sand. He pulled her close to his body, holding her like she was a precious gem.

"We don't need music."

He began to sway, resting his head against hers. She let him lead, body feeling lazy and warm in his embrace. The sun was rapidly setting, casting a cool glow across the beach. Just a few miles away, there was a bustling tourist city they hadn't even bothered to explore.

Not that she minded. The moment they stepped foot into their rental, they only left for food and to play in the ocean. It was unanimously decided upon to do nothing but lounge around naked and have their ways with each other. It was the best vacation she could remember having in a long time.

They didn't talk for a while, listening to the ocean and letting their bodies guide their motions. She laughed when he spun her around, nearly tripping over one another when her foot caught in the sand.

"I'm glad we got drunk and realized our feelings for each other."

Liv pressed her forehead against his as her fingers played with the hair at the nape of his neck. She couldn't have agreed more with that statement.

"I'm glad we did, too. What do you think would have happened if you hadn't come to the bar that night?"

Rafael hummed, "I suspect I'd be knee deep in paperwork and misery right about now. Drinking myself to sleep while you were away having the time of your life with some handsome, strapping officer who swept you off your feet before I could tell you how I felt about you."

"Hmm. Handsome, strapping officer…sounds like Ed…"

She yelped when he smacked her bottom, "Don't go there Mrs. Barba."

Liv slapped his ass back in retaliation, "I'll go there whenever I please, Mrs. Barba's husband."

They descended into a fit of giggles, wrapped up in each other's embrace while the continued to sway. They held each other until the sun went down over the ocean, the moon bathing them in a bright glow. Both remained quiet, until Liv pecked and stroked his cheek, grabbing his attention once more.

"I don't think I would have ended up with anyone else but you," she said softly, "I wouldn't have wanted to end up with anyone else but you."

"Good," he whispered, capturing her lips again, "Because I have you and I'm never letting you go."

He pulled back and linked their hands together, leading them back towards their beach rental, where they would drink and eat and enjoy each other's company until tomorrow, when they would return to their normal, everyday lives with their son in the city they would never leave.

"Promise?"

She didn't need an answer, but Rafael humored her anyway and just as he opened the door to the house, he whispered the only word he could think of in her ear.

"Always."


End file.
